Sometimes it’s hard being so predictable. I shift, sitting up, and pat the spot beside me. “Break time.”
Kendrick settles, remote in hand, and I immediately curl into his side. This is my favourite part of the day, when it’s just thetwo of us, with nothing demanding our attention or time. When the only thing he’s focused on is me.
“Spence…”
“Mmm?” Why’s he interrupting my snuggle time?
“We need to talk.”
“Do we?” About what? Can’t it wait?
“You don’t think we do?”
It depends on what he wants to talk about. What we have doesn’t need words. So long as he’s touching me, that’s all we need.
“I shouldn’t have kissed you like that.”
Wait, what? I jerk upright in surprise, twisting to stare at him. “Why not? You said you liked it,” I accuse. He started it! “Were you lying to me?” That more than anything starts a dull ache in the pit of my stomach. If he doesn’t enjoy what we do together, then what use am I?
“Of course not.”
“Then I don’t understand. If you like doing something, you don’t have regrets about it.”
“That’s not always how it works.” Kendrick sighs and bends a knee, leaning against the arm of the couch so that he’s facing me. “You don’t—we’re not like that.You’renot like that, and I shouldn’t have done it.”
“I liked it too,” I say in a small voice. “Is this because I didn’t get off on it? That doesn’t matter to me.” I can enjoy something without getting horny about it. Why is that the only indication of pleasure? Why can’t it be more than that, without getting stuck on that detail?
“It matters to me.”
Oh.
“Fuck, don’t look at me like that, Spence.”
“Like what?”
“Like I kicked you. Baby, this isn’t—it feels like I took advantage. That I took something from you that you don’t want to give.”
It’s the first time he’s ever called mebaby. I can’t help the way it makes my heart flutter. I want to hear it again. I don’t care how he means it. It doesn’t matter. I’ll grasp it with both hands and never let it go. “There’s nothing I don’t want to give.”
“I know you think that, but—”
“But what? You don’t get to decide.” There’s nothing I wouldn’t give him if he asked for it. Whatever he wants, he can have it. “Am I not enough for you? Is that what this is about?” Anger joins the ache, swirling until they’re all twisted up and painful, squeezing me and making it hard to breathe. Every day it feels like he’s pulling away from me, and I don’t know how to fix it. I won’t let him leave. He doesn’t get to give up on this.
Kendrick cradles my face, his touch soft and firm simultaneously. He forces me to look up into his warm hazel-green gaze. “You aremorethan enough. Spence, you’re everything.”
“Prove it.”
I know he can see the challenge I’m throwing down. He knows exactly what I’m asking for. That kiss was his. He initiated it. And I want it again. There’s no stopping at just one, not with us.
He doesn’t hesitate, leaning in to press his lips against mine. It feels like all our other kisses, all the ones that aremine. Cursory. A snack, not a meal. I don’t want mine; I want his. That urgent desperation. The taste of him invading me. All it takes is a slide of my tongue against his bottom lip, and he groans, cupping the back of my neck and taking over.
Yes.Lifting onto my knees, I straddle his hip awkwardly, his knee jammed up under me. I don’t care. I’d sink into him if I could. Become one and live inside him forever.
His arm wraps around my waist, and he dislodges his leg, allowing me to settle properly on top of him. I’ve never been this close, felt it like this. Why not? It’s evidence of how much he wants me. That Iownhim.
“You’re hard for me,” I whisper against his lips, grinding down on his cock. “You want me.”
He pulls back, hesitating. “What are you doing?”
