“Bedtime is in an hour.”
“Seth?” he says before I close the door behind me. He’s the only one who doesn’t call me ‘dad.’ Sawyer was three years old, and Emilywas an infant when Malcolm and I adopted them. They don’t know any other parent other than me. They don’t even remember my ex-husband, except for Harrison, but he was seven at the time. He still remembers his deceased mother and his absent father.
When Malcolm left, I had to put Harrison into therapy because he was already dealing with abandonment.
“Yes, Hare.”
“Do you think you’ll ever get married again?”
I step back into his room and sit on the edge of his bed. “Why? What brought that on?”
He shrugs again and still won’t look at me. “Some kid in my class made fun of me for being adopted. Like maybe if you get married to a girl, then kids won’t make fun of me so much.”
He finally looks at me with dark brown eyes when I comb back the curls from his face with my fingers. I’m calm on the outside, but on the inside, I’m raging that kids can be so cruel sometimes. “You know I’m gay, honey. Marrying a woman isn’t going to happen. Besides, those kids shouldn’t be making fun of you at all. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being adopted or having one parent. Even if I were married to a woman and you weren’t adopted, that boy would find something else to pick on you about. That’s how bullies work.”
“I guess, but will you get married again?”
“Do you want me to?”
“I don’t know… What if they leave, too?”
My heart aches for him. I completely understand his fear. Despite all that work with the therapist, his abandonment issues linger.
Marriage is the last thing I want. It’s been two years since Malcolm left, and I still have no interest in dating. Life is busy enough without having to navigate a relationship. I’m not in the headspace for a boyfriend. It’s hard to trust after that.
“Maybe one day, but not anytime soon. Do I need to talk to your teacher about the bullying?”
Harrison shakes his head and looks away again. “Mrs. Willis already talked to him and said it wasn’t nice to make fun of me, but he still does it.”
I make a mental note to talk with his teacher anyway. The last thing I want is more setbacks with my son. He’s had a hard enough road as it is. I don’t need some punk kid to undo all that work. Harrison deserves happiness and confidence.
“We’ll deal with it. Anything else you’d like to talk about?”
“No.”
I lean forward and kiss the top of his head. “You can always talk to me about anything. I love you.”
“Love you.”
Harrison saying those words back fills my heart every time. It took him over a year to say them.
I leave his room and head to Sawyer’s room to help him read before I read to Emily. Then it’s an early night for me.
Call me old-fashioned, but I love reading a physical newspaper instead of on my phone. There’s something about the crisp paper under my fingertips and the smell of newsprint, along with my coffee, that gets me going in the morning.
I head outside to grab my paper from the driveway before the kids are awake. It’s still dark out, but the sun is rising, casting the neighborhood in a gray hue. It’s humid as always, and it will only grow worse as the day warms up.
Malcolm and I moved into this house before the kids came to live with us. We bought it to ensure we had space for all three of them, each with their own room and independence. The home was newly constructed when we moved in, and part of a great school district, which is perfect for raising a family.
When I reach for my newspaper on my driveway, I stop in my tracks to look at my neighbor’s yard. Something odd and out-of-place catches my eye.
He’d moved in several months ago. Calvin freakin’ Abernathy. Why the hell does he need a five-bedroom house while living alone? All he does is complain about my kids’ toys or the noise they make. Granted, sometimes their stuff spills into his yard, but I try to keep up with it. Still, he’s never satisfied. I have nothing against him, but I am wary around him.
I walk closer to his yard to find him sipping coffee and wearing only light blue boxers and a matching bathrobe. He’s shirtless, and even in the dim lighting, I can see how fit and tan he is. If he weren’t so annoying, I’d find him attractive. Fine, he’s highly attractive, hot even, but I’d never be interested in someone like Calvin. If I ever date again, he has to like kids and be patient. My neighbor isn’t patient, and so far, doesn’t seem interested in kids at all.
He takes no notice of me while he takes a sip from his mug, before he bends down and grabs an animal wicket from Sawyer’s croquet set and stacks it on the other toys. The zebra wicket sits at the top, and underneath are Harrison’s bike, Emily’s Cozy Coupe, a bubble lawn mower, balls, mallets, a toy gardening set, and more.
I guess it’s fair to be annoyed with the toys if my kids left all those in his yard. I’ve already told them several times to stop doing that and to pick up after themselves.
