I try to conjure my inner Seth. What would he do?Be vulnerable, Cal, he’d tell me.
“I knew your mom before I knew your dad. We were attending Rice together. She was so pretty and vibrant. I was dating a guy at the time; otherwise, I would’ve been interested in dating her. We ended up being best friends. Your mom was an incredible person.”
He still says nothing, but this time, he rolls over and tucks himself against me. I rest a comforting hand on his shoulder.
“I remember the day she met your dad. He had a grace about him, not only grace, but he had this aura that made you want to like him. It’s hard to pinpoint how or why you simply wanted to be his friend as soon as you met him, or in your mom’s case, to be his girlfriend. Your mom was the same way. She was easily likable. It’s no wonder they were drawn to each other.”
“Where did they meet?” he asks. His voice is so soft I barely hear him.
“There’s this bar close to the university where your mom and I would drink and play trivia games. We went there with my boyfriend at the time. She was so damn smart. You kind of have to be to get into Rice. It was like she held the world’s knowledge in that amazing brain of hers. Then in walks your dad, all dapper, even in a T-shirt and jeans. I mean, who irons their jeans?”
Braeden huffs a little laugh as he listens to my story.
“His eyes landed on your mom, and I knew right then that history was made. They were drawn to each other like moths to a flame. Two pieces of a puzzle. Of course, they hit it off immediately. And I was there to watch them date, fall in love, get married, and eventually have you. Then I missed the rest of it, much to my regret. Unfortunately, no matter how much we wish for it, we can’t turn back time. There are no do-overs in life.”
Braeden takes my hand in his and looks up at me with his swollen eyes. “They would’ve forgiven you.”
I smile at that. It takes all my power to keep from fucking bawling my eyes out, but I don’t. Still, my eyes burn like hell from holding the tears back, and I take a shuddered breath. “I know they would. Even though they’ve passed, they will always have a piece of themselves in thisworld in you. You carry their legacy. You carry who they were and what they looked like. They will never be truly gone.”
“I like that.”
I blew out a breath in relief that I’m making him feel at least a little better.
“Can I ask a personal question?” he says.
“Sure.”
“S-so you’re gay?”
“Bisexual, actually. Why?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know.”
“Do you have questions about your sexuality? If you do, you can always talk to me about it. I know you’re young, so you’re still learning about yourself.”
He shrugs again. “I don’t feel any way about anyone. Do you think that’s weird? I’m not talking about now, but when I was in school and stuff. Kids in my last school were dating already.”
“It’s not weird. Sometimes people take years to figure out who they are and who they like, while others know right away. I’m sure it will come to you.”
“Did you figure it out early?”
“Pretty early. I was a year younger than you when I had a crush on a boy, but the following year I dated a girl. I lean more toward men, but I like the ladies, too.”
We don’t talk about anything else when he grows quiet, and I run out of things to say. I scroll through my phone as Braeden tries to sleep.
When there’s a sudden knock on the door, I get out of bed and answer it to room service. The man brings in a tray full of appetizers and shit, so Braeden can pick through what he wants to eat. It’s here if he wants it. After I tip the man, he leaves and closes the door behind him.
I look at my phone again, and there’s still no response from Seth. I really need to talk to him.
I need him.
I step over to Braeden and touch his shoulder. He opens his eyes, but still says nothing.
“I’m going to go downstairs to make a call. I’ll be at the bar if you need me. Just text me, and I’ll be right up.”
“Okay.”
“There’s food here if you get hungry. Will you be okay?”
