Oh, I got plenty.
I list off the bitter custody battle he's embroiled in, the huge shift he’s making in his career and how big an undertaking it is getting the Grizzlies ready for their first season, and that from what I've read, he's only a few months out of rehab. All perfectly sound, logical reasons why TD might not be open to datinganyone.
When Bean opens his mouth with what I'm sure is a well-intentioned counter-argument, I throw in what I do for work because if nothing else I've said cuts through, that doozy is guaranteed to repel anyone even remotely interested in me.
To my surprise, my offense-as-defense play actually works. I've silenced my best friend, which is a very rare achievement. He finishes chewing his roll, wipes the corner of his mouth with his napkin, and simply says, "Just talk to him, and I'm sure you'll be able to sort it out."
Funnily enough, he's absolutely right.
When I get home, the first words out of TD's mouth are, "I'm so sorry." I tell him it's no big deal, and we agree to put it behind us.
Well, I'm surehe'sable to do that.
Me? I crank out another one under the covers that night, imagining I walked in a few minutes earlier. TD would be embarrassed, of course, but still hard. I'd tell him it's fine, and in some romantic and totally non-porny way, we'd end up having hot, passionate, sweaty sex.
So, yeah, it's official. I'm totally crushing on my coach roomie.
9
TD
The cold bites at our cheeks as we run through another red-zone drill, bodies packed tight near the goal line and everyone scrambling to punch the ball in. We’re a week out from the season starting, and we've come a long way from a month ago—routes tighter, timing sharper—but I still feel an uneasy knot in my gut.
Although, maybe that doesn't have as much to do with my concerns about how we’re going to stack up in our first season and more to do with the situation brewing on the homefront.
Tex and I have managed to put jerk-off gate behind us. He was great about the whole thing, accepting my apology, and not mentioning it ever again.
But there have been some other developments since then that have caused me to look at things, and him, in a different light.
Example one. A few days later, the team found me a small townhouse to move into. When I told Tex, he deflated instantly and mentioned I was welcome to stay with him, that he was enjoying the company. Since I was as well, I declined the offer, genuinely moved that he was enjoying our living arrangement as much as I was.
Example two. The way he looks at me, especially during my morning routine. I have a, uh…uniquequirk where I don't like drying off with a towel. Never have. It feels scratchy and irritates my skin. So I air dry. If I were living alone, I'd walk around naked. Since that's not the case, I wrap a towel around myself.
I suspected Tex was checking me outfrom the very first morning, but then a reality check: why would a gorgeous, charming, friendly twenty-something guy be sizing up a fossil like me? But I'm pretty sure that, for some reason, he is. His subtlety has slowly slipped away, and now he downright ogles me, and I like it.A lot.
Example three. We went fishing again last weekend. I felt just as relaxed and had as much fun as I did before. But this time, we had a moment.
Well, wealmosthad a moment. I think.
A gust of cold air swept over, and I shivered. Tex noticed, so he poured me a cup of hot cider. As he handed it to me, our gloved fingers brushed. And lingered. Longer than necessary. He smiled. Soft, surprised, unguarded. I smiled back. He leaned in ever so slightly. I did, too. And then…the tip-up flag snapped upright, and we broke apart.
What the hell am I supposed to make of all this?
On top of it all, I've got a team to get ready for their first season and a court showdown with my ex-wife set for three weeks from now.
The timing couldn't be worse, but the way it feels when Tex and I are together, sipping our coffees in the morning, having dinner at The Leafy Nook as we talk about our days, it feels so good, so settled. It's dangerously addictive. Dangerous because it would be completely inappropriate to pursue it. I'm a walking, talking red flag mess. Not to mention, way too old for him.
I’m staring past the end zone, way too in my head than warranted given nothing has actually happened between Tex and me, when a throat clears right beside me. I blink to find Kimball and our trainer, waiting. How long have they been there?
The trainer tilts his head. "Coach, we wrapping up for today?"
I snap myself out of my Tex haze and answer, "Yeah. We’re done."
The trainer leaves. Kimball stays. "Everything okay?"
I'm fine. Just developing wildly inconvenient feelings for your younger brother. No biggie.
"Yeah. I'm good."
