“I don’t know,” Violet says, “I think I might just let my mom doallthe cooking next year. I mean, she’s clearly the expert around here. Look at the mess I made of the yams.”
“I’m starting to think she’s a wizard,” I reply, nodding toward Alice, who’s just brought in another platter of food, her face glowing with pride. “It reminds me of that one Christmas I came here, too.”
“Oh, please,” Alice says with a laugh. “If I were a wizard, I’d just wish it all into existence and save myself some effort. And you know, Dakota, you are always welcome here. Charlie, too. I’ve missed having you sitting at my table.”
I swallow a lump rising in my throat. The words start to spill out of my mouth before I can even think about what I’m saying.
“Obviously, my dad wasn’t ever around, and things could be… tough with my mom.” I never talk about this. It isn’t easy for me, but it feels like the right time to let some of it out. I just hope I don’t ruin the whole vibe. “But these days, ever since Mom left Colter Creek, we’ve been even more distant. So I’vealwaysbeen grateful to have you guys.”
Alice smiles softly but doesn’t say anything, allowing me to get the rest of my thoughts out.
“It’s just… hard, you know? When you grow up with someone who’s supposed to be your rock, your constant, and then one day they just… aren’t. Mom moved away to start fresh in Seattle, and for a while, I guess I thought it might change. Maybe she’d come around, or we’d be close again.” I pause. “But she’s never really been there for me. Or for Charlie.”
She barely knows my son. I guess I let her down by having a child out of wedlock, too, but it was never in my plans. It just happened, and I guess she doesn’t want to see it or be a part of it.
There’s nothing I can do about that.
“That’s the hardest part, isn’t it?” Alice agrees. “The people who are supposed to love you the most sometimes don’t show up the way you need them to.”
Violet gives me a soft, understanding smile. “You’re doing a great job, Dakota. Charlie’s lucky to have you. And you’ve built something here, too. This,” she gestures around the table, “this is what matters.”
I nod as I glance toward my son. This is why it’s so hard for me to talk to Clint. I know what rejection does to a child, because I lived it myself. From both my parents.
I can handle it now, not having a family, but growing up, it was rough. Ineverwant Charlie to experience that feeling.
When Clint kissed me, for a brief moment, I thought everything had fallen into place. But then I saw hesitation on his face, and I pulled back. He did the same, letting the moment dissolve as if it had never happened.
I can’t risk Charlie reaching for him one day and being met with that same uncertainty.
“Mom, can we show Alice our animal game?”
Violet’s eyes widen in mock horror. “Oh no, not the animal game! I’m terrible at it.”
Charlie springs out of his seat, already pulling her out of her chair. “You’re the best at it, Violet! You’re good at all the animal noises!”
Violet laughs, rolling her eyes but getting up anyway. “Alright, alright. I don’t want to hear any complaints when I make the best giraffe sound you’ve ever heard.”
We all gather around the living room, the last traces of Thanksgiving dinner forgotten in favor of a game that Charlie’s eager to play. Alice joins us too, leaning against the arm of the couch, ready to get in on the fun.
“Okay,” Charlie announces, “I’ll go first!” He grins, clearly pleased with himself. “I’m going to be… a lion!”
He puffs out his chest and lets out the loudest roar he can muster, falling over dramatically onto the carpet.
“Wow, that was a great lion!” Alice exclaims, clapping her hands. “Now, who’s next?”
Violet is quick to jump in, making a show of stretching like a cat and then suddenly leaping across the room with a loud meow. “Watch out, I’m the fiercest house cat ever!”
We all laugh, the sound of it bouncing off the walls. Even I can’t resist when Charlie turns to me, his face full of expectation.
“Your turn, Mom,” he says, his eyes wide with trust.
I sigh dramatically, but I can’t help the smile that pulls at my lips. “Alright, alright. I’ll do a horse.”
I stand up, making a show of tossing my hair over my shoulder, then mimicking the sound of hooves hitting the ground.
“Clippity-clop, clippity-clop!” I prance around the room like an awkward but enthusiastic horse.
Charlie giggles uncontrollably, clapping his hands. “That was the best horse!”
