“Go to sleep.”
Instead, she propped up her elbow, resting her cheek against one hand. “I think I provoke you, without even meaning to. You seem to be angry right now.”
He wasn’t angry. It was desire taking command of his senses, pushing back the walls of grief and making him crave her. In this small space, he could smell the floral scent of this woman, and he wanted to close the distance, letting her rest her head against his lap.
He locked down those visions. Amelia deserved so much more than a man like him. She should have a husband who would adore her and children of her own.
“I’m not angry,” he said. “But I’ve been thinking about how to solve this problem. You shouldn’t be ruined because of one man’s impulsive mistake.”
“I will not marry him,” she insisted. “No matter what anyone else says I should do.”
“No. But if you remain unmarried, the gossip will worsen.”
Amelia sat up and regarded him, her face serious. It seemed that she’d suddenly understood what he was implying. “Youcould marry me,” she ventured. “No one would say a word against me or my family if the man who rescued me became my husband.”
Before he could say anything, she sighed. “But then, I don’t suppose I would make a very good mother to your daughter. I tend to break the rules more than I follow them.”
“Unfortunately, so does Christine.” The change in topic gave him the means to avoid a direct answer. “She has a governess, but Miss Grant cannot teach her how to properly behave in London society.”
“I doknowthe rules,” Amelia admitted. “Margaret drilled them into me, often enough.” She let out a heavy sigh, her green eyes staring at him. “I don’t know what we should do, either.”
He suspected that was an untruth. The answer was there, but she didn’t want to force him into a marriage he didn’t want.
“If youwereto marry me,” he began, “we would be friends, nothing more. And I know that isn’t what you want.”
She thought about it a moment. “You mean that I would have your name and your protection…but we would not truly be as man and wife.”
It was the honorable way to manage this, offering her a celibate marriage. But the idea of being married to Amelia without touching her was another torment. “Not at first,” he said.Not unless you want to.
She met his gaze, but he could read the uncertainty there. “I thought you needed an heir.”
He did. And he wasn’t opposed to Amelia giving him a child, so long as she didn’t fall in love with him. “If you are uncomfortable with the idea, we can wait.”
She cast her gaze downward a moment, as if the topic embarrassed her. “I would think I could managethatduty, if nothing else. It might be a trifle awkward, but if we are friends, I suppose I could endure it.”
It took an effort to keep his mouth from dropping open. “Endure it?” She made him sound like he had no idea how to make love to a woman.
“You needn’t fear that I’d want or expect you to fall in love with me,” Amelia continued. “Your first wife can remain upon that ivory pedestal. But I would think that you could at least give me a wedding night and teach me what I should know about my marital duties. Surely that’s not too much to ask.”
The idea of teaching her how to be his lover was incredibly arousing. His body stiffened at the thought, and right now, he wanted to press her down against the bench. He wanted to touch her skin, to capture that mouth and pleasure her until she shuddered.
“You don’t know what you’re saying, Amelia.” She had no concept of the intimacy of lovemaking.
“That’s true enough. I have no experience with sharing a man’s bed. But it can’t bethatdifficult. Isn’t it a matter of fitting one part into another and that’s that?”
He nearly choked at her prediction. “Who told you such a thing?”
“No one. But I did figure it out on my own, when I saw some dogs together,” she confessed. “My sisters won’t tell me anything, but I suppose it must be the same. Mother promised that on my wedding night she’d explain it.”
“It’s very different,” he said. Within the coach, the atmosphere grew charged, almost as if a rush of heated air filled the interior. Perhaps theycouldenjoy that aspect of marriage, so long as theyremained only friends. If it was a means of physical release and creating an heir, was there anything wrong with that?
Amelia sat up, watching him intently. “Will you tell me what lovemaking is like? Every time I ask, my sisters start laughing at me.”
He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. She did the same, and her face was hardly more than a hand’s width away. For a while, he let her anticipation build before he gave her a resounding, “No. I won’t tell you about it.”
I’d rather show you.
She let out a sigh. “I’ve embarrassed you, haven’t I? I know it’s not proper at all, but youhavebeen married before. I thought you could give me a little more detail, especially if we did marry.”
