Deep down, the decision on a marriage of convenience, while protecting her reputation, had left her feeling wounded and longing for more. She cared deeply for Raphael, but despite that, she wasn’t certain whether this was the right decision. She feared that the salvation of her reputation would come at a price that was too high, too costly.
As her mother continued to express her joy and anticipation for the upcoming wedding, Keira maintained her composed facade, keeping her inner turmoil hidden from the world. She had chosen duty and responsibility over passionate love, and she felt that she was already losing herself, losing the battle to the ache in her heart.
Keira was barely listening to the conversation that seemed to take place between her mother and Jasper. Joan was the onewho noticed subtle signs of her discomfort despite the cheerful facade she was maintaining.
Joan suddenly leaned in and whispered, “Keira, I can see that this evening has been overwhelming for you. How about we take a nice walk in the garden for a breath of fresh air and some quiet time away from the festivities?”
Keira, grateful for Joan’s insight and support, nodded in agreement. “Thank you, Joan. A walk in the garden sounds like a lovely idea.”
She informed her mother of their intent, and much to her surprise, her mother didn’t seem to mind at all.
“Of course, my dear. You just go out and refresh yourself. After all, the festivities will continue well into the night. You need your strength!” With those words, the Duchess kissed Keira tenderly on the cheek and went back into the crowd, proud and joyful.
Keira sighed heavily, but before she could slip into the clutches of despair again, her friend grabbed her by the hand. Together, they slipped away from the lively cèilidh, leaving the hustle and bustle of the grand hall behind, and entered the tranquility of the castle’s gardens.
When she turned to face Joan again, Keira knew that her friend could sense that something was wrong.
Joan’s voice was grave and solemn as she spoke, with tenderness only the best of friends could offer. “So, will you tell me what is really going on?”
22
Keira looked up at her friend as the two of them took a seat on one of the marble benches in the garden, close to the castle. She could only hope that her subtle signs of discomfort were noticed only by her caring and perceptive friend and that the cheerful facade she had maintained worked on everyone else.
With a warm and understanding smile, Joan leaned in closer to Keira. “You can tell me what’s on your mind, or we can just sit here in silence. I don’t mind either of the two.”
Keira inhaled deeply. She appreciated the support of her friend, although she wasn’t really in the mood to talk. But perhaps talking would make the burden she had been carrying less heavy.
“Everyone seems to be happy about this betrothal.” Keira sighed. “Everyone but me and Raphael.”
“Are you regretting the choice you’ve made?” Joan asked as the chirping of crickets sounded somewhere in the distance.
“No, no.” Keira shook her head. “It isn’t that at all.” She looked out into the distance. The tranquil night in the garden stood in stark contrast to her tumultuous thoughts.
“Then what is it?” Joan asked as gently as she could. “Is it because Avery and Anthony did not make it to the party?”
“No.” Keira frowned. “That is an explanation I will be happy to offer to my parents or anyone else who notices me sulking. But you know better than that.”
“Maybe I do, but you know it is always better to get it off your chest, Keira,” Joan reminded her. “You know that I am here for you, to listen to you, to help you in any way I can.”
“I know.” Keira smiled. Her heart was filled with gratitude for Joan’s presence and friendship. The weight of her complicated emotions and the expectations of the evening had been momentarily lifted by the understanding and support of her dear friend.
Keira, sitting alongside Joan, felt a sudden surge of vulnerability. She couldn’t keep her emotions at bay any longer. “Joan, I have to admit something. I think… I’m falling in love with Raphael.”
Joan looked at Keira with compassion. “I knew it! I just knew it! I’ve seen the way you both look at each other. It is clear that there is something more than just friendship between you two.”
Keira’s heart ached as she replied, her voice quivering, “I’m afraid that you are seeing things that aren’t there, dear Joan.”
Joan’s brows knotted in confusion. “What do you mean?”
“I mean to say that all we could ever have is a marriage of convenience.” Keira tried to explain as best as she could in an effort to cause herself the least amount of pain, but that was an impossible feat. “He said we could be friends, but nothing more. In his own words, it is the best course of action for me—for us both.”
The truth hung heavily in the air, and the contrast between Keira’s feelings and Raphael’s intentions was a poignant reminder of the complexities they faced.
In an effort to console her friend, Joan placed a gentle hand on Keira’s shoulder. “Keira, love has its own way of working. Perhaps, in time, Raphael will come to realize the depth of his feelings for you as well. Sometimes, these things take time to unfold.”
Keira nodded, appreciating Joan’s attempt to offer solace. But the uncertainty weighed heavily on her heart, and she admitted with a sigh, “I want to believe that, Joan. But it’s hard. Right now, all I can see is the reality of a marriage of convenience, and I’m not sure if that will ever change.”
Joan thought about it for a moment. “Have you spoken to Raphael about your feelings? Maybe he doesn’t fully understand what’s in your heart. Maybe he is also keeping his own emotions hidden because he doesn’t know yours.”
