Tim looked especially smug. ‘Orlando. As you said, Michael, not a name you forget.’
Aleksey fumbled with his own phone for a moment then slammed his hand on the table and everyone jumped. ‘Fuck!’ He showed them all his screen, and at their blank expressions snapped, ‘We’ve missed the last flight from St Mary’s today.’
Squeezy was nodding seriously now and held up a finger for patience while he wrote something laboriously on his sheet of scribbles. He pondered it, then corrected it a little, underlined something, and then added a very careful full stop. ‘This big shabby house, like, is on the cliffs, and it had its own bleeding dock. And it’s’—he pretended to consult a non-existent watch—‘’bout three hours sailing away.’
* * *
‘Tell me why we’re doing this again?’ Ben huddled down into his inadequate jacket once more and tried to pretend he was warm. Aleksey didn’t think his beloved was getting into the spirit of this mission at all and was tempted to mention the three-letter acronym Ben liked to trot out to prove he was the physically superior one in this partnership. Well, beingSASalso meant not complaining about being cold as far as he was concerned. He wasalwayscold, buthewasn’t whining. Nikolas would have been over the side if he’d behaved that way on one of their forays around the islands of their childhood…but he wasn’t too sure he could wrestle Ben anywhere he didn’t want to go.
‘Because. As our new genius has discovered’—he gave a little hand wave of appreciation to Timothy Watson, who had actually brought a blanket, and was only visible as a pair of owlish glasses poking out from the top of a miserable heap—‘this school friend of the moron’s—’
‘—Hey! Whoisthis fucking moron character who comes into all your conversations,wassock? No morons piloting this here boat for you.’
‘This Sharpie stole the possessions of Robert Frobisher. It only makes sense he went back to his house to put the pieces of the map he found with the pieces he already had. So, thecompletemap will be there.’
‘Did I fall asleep and miss something?’
Aleksey ignored Ben. Obviously, it was pieces of a treasure map. What else could he have found?
Ben wasn’t to be deterred. ‘What are we going to do when we get there? Middle of the night? Private house? Read that stuff you found out about it again, Timbo.’
After the sound of some clicking, a muffled voice issued from beneath its blanket. ‘Chi Lugern Enys. Grade II list—’
‘See?Chez Moi. Told you it was some dumb-arse name.’
Ignoring his boyfriend as ever, Tim continued from inside his little tent, ‘Privately owned by the same prominent Cornish family since fifteen something or other. On the western cliffs overlooking the Atlantic. Not open to the public—tourists can only admire its medieval roof from the adjacent promontory. Owner currently in consultation about having that portion of the house relisted as Grade I, which would make it only the second such listed sixteenth-century house in Cornwall and would thereby enable it to be eligible for grants and other financial incentives from local authority bodies as well as blah blah blah. It’s got nice gardens.’
Aleksey looked triumphantly at Ben. ‘There you go.’
‘Where?’
‘What?’
‘There I go where? What’s any of that got to do with how are we going to get into the house without arousing suspicions?’
Was it just him? Why was everyone being so obtuse? ‘We will be tourists admiring the gardens—but get lost! Do we not have such transgressions in our valley all the time?’
‘You’ve got the funny accent down pat, boss, that’s for sure.’ Aleksey nodded towards the moron at the helm. It was the first time he could ever remember welcoming his input in any conversation. Then the idiot sniggered and pointed out,
‘Course, if we knew someone who knew the fucking owner from school, we could just turn up and say hello.’
* * *
Seen from the Atlantic, they all had to admit the house was pretty impressive. It did indeed sit atop the cliffs on the northern coastline of Cornwall, as close to Land’s End as to make no difference to four frozen men in a small boat. They tied up to a stone pier which struck out from a small cove at the base of the cliff and climbed extremely stiffly out of their tiny craft. As Squeezy had pointed out, however, he’d only hired a boat for one, for a short nip to Light Island. He hadn’t expected to become the Allan Quatermain of Scilly. Aleksey checked his watch, but as he couldn’t read it during daylight had no chance in the dark. Ben said dryly, ‘Nearly four.’
‘Excellent. Come. Perfect time for a school reunion.’
Following him, they began to climb the steep steps which led from the cove up the face of the cliff.
‘I hope ‘e still lives up to ‘is nickname.’ Squeezy muttered this mainly to himself as none of them were listening. It was tricky navigating the steps in the dark, the Atlantic breakers worryingly close on one side and slimy cliff face the other.
Behind him, Ben started to speak. ‘—don’t ask! I have told you, Benjamin, never ask him.’
He heard a huff from the idiot in front.
‘Cus, like, he always had pockets full of chockies, and I’m fucking starving.’ Sensing he was getting no reaction, he turned and began to walk backwards.
‘So, boss. What we gonna do? Inside the house. Bit of torture to reveal the location of the map?’
