Prologue
Sam,
My momgot on a plane as soon as I finally called her and told her whathappened, so I'm flying back home with her now.I didn't want towake you to say bye, especially since you didn't really sleep lastnight.I just wanted to say thank you for everything.Forconvincing me to come on this trip in the first place, for makingsure I had a good time that first night out, for taking care of mewhen I got sick.Some of the best moments of my life were with youon this trip.
I hatethat you think that you're even remotely to blame for what happenedlast night.The only thing you're responsible for is saving me.Iwon't ever be able to repay you, Sam.I just hope you know howgrateful I am and how much you mean to me.
I'msorry for how I handled things, or for the fact that I can't handlethings.I'm sorry if I hurt you.You'll never know how much.Youare still one of my best friends in the world, and I love you forthat.Please try not to worry about me, I will be fine, I alwaysam, right?Just try to enjoy the rest of your trip.Go to thebeach, to the bars, do all the things you should have been doingthis whole time, and I'll just see you when you getback.
Love,
Rory
Chapter One
Anote.A stupid fucking note.She left in the middle of thenight and left me anote.
How can I have the bestand worst fucking experiences of my life all in the same fuckingday?
And since when do I cursethis much?
Never in a million yearsdid I think this would be me.A heartbroken, sorry shmuck, and onspring break no less.I have fucking whiplash from the events ofthe past twenty-four hours.
This is why you don't havea girlfriend in high school.
First, I have the mostmind blowing,life alteringafternoon with the most beautiful girl on God'sgood earth, and then, because of my own pathetic jealousy, I lether put herself in danger.
You can't imagine whatit's like to see the girl you care about more than your own damnedself pinned to a wall in a dark alley with a fucking monsterattacking her.To watch her live out her worstnightmare—literally—because I was too blinded by my own insecurities to stop itright away.
I take another shot oftequila in an attempt to erase the image that's been laser printedonto my brain.
But one good thing didcome of that shitty fucking night.I found my fucking balls.Aftereverything was said and done, and Rory was safe in my arms again, Itold her I loved her.
Me.Sam Caplan.The guy who had a rule about not having arelationship in high school so I wouldn't repeat my parents'pathetic, cliched mistakes—link myself to some chick I thought Iloved until I hated both her and myself.Because love wasn't real,right?
And then in walks Rory.With her downplayed beauty, and her perfect little body.Herdefiance and her vulnerability.God, it's like it just snuck up onme and yet at the same time it hit me like a goddamned freighttrain the moment I caught sight of her—freaking out by the lockersat school, acting all tough even while she was trying not to fallapart.
I rub my eyes with theheels of my palms.My head hurts from overthinking every detail ofthe past couple days like a fucking girl.
Rory loves me too.Shesaid it.She meant it.I know she did.
But then I got into afistfight with herfatherin a goddamned police precinct.And I'd been sogood at controlling my "anger issues" lately.But thatson of a bitchwas thereto help her attacker, and called her aliar, and when he reached out tograb her arm, I fucking lost it.No way was I going to let anotherman—whoever the hell he was—lay a hand on her without herpermission again.Not after everything she'd already been through.No fucking way.
A loud crashing soundacross the room is the only indication that I've thrown anotherglass against the wall.I groan and rub at my temples.That was mylast glass.I take the next shot straight from the bottle.
I hit her fucking father.What the hell is wrong with me?
The best part—the trulyhilarious part—is that even afterthat, I was stillchoke-on-your-own-breath, heart-stoppingly shocked when she endedit.
Fucking idiot.
Never have I had astronger urge to punch myself in the face.
I stare at the screen ofmy phone for the thousandth time since I woke up yesterday to findshe'd gone back home with nothing but a fucking note left in herplace.I will my phone to buzz with a call from her, or even atext, explainingsomething.Though I guess that'swhat the note was meant to do.
But it still doesn'tactuallyexplainanything.
What the fuck do you needexplained?You fucking hit her father!
