I nod like I understand.
I don’t understand. School is important, but so is Beth. Would it have been that big a deal to go to a slightly less impressive school to be near the girl he claims to fucking love? Of course the school he chooses will affect his future, but the same can be said about Beth. So the only conclusion I can draw is that he’s not sure she’s his future. At least not enough to make her a priority. And yet, according to him, that didn’t stop him from taking her motherfucking virginity.
“So what’s the plan for next year then?” I ask him, all still waters on the surface.
He frowns. “Plan?”
Is this guy for real? “To see Beth.” Dipshit. “You gonna drive home every other weekend? Still got over a year before she gets her license,” I remind him.
He blinks at me. Has he not considered any of this? “I guess we’ll figure it out as it happens, you know?”
I let out a short laugh. “As it happens? As what happens? As hot, drunk, freshman girls throw themselves at you? As Beth sits home instead of making new friends because she’s being loyal to her boyfriend?”
“She won’t sit home,” he argues halfheartedly.
“She’s sitting home right now,” I remind him.
Falco swallows audibly.
“Look man, you and me, we don’t know each other. Not really. But you know Beth is like a sister to me, right?”
He snorts. “You remind me every chance you get.” Fair enough.
“Beth is a good girl.” I tell him what he already knows. “If you stay together, she’s going to wait for you. She’s going to sit home on weekends, waiting to FaceTime with you, missing her high school experience altogether, and then she’ll do the same thing in college.”
Falco stares at me, unblinking, warily following the strokes of my words as they paint him a portrait we both know to be spot-fucking-on.
I shift my tone, and I don’t even have to feign the envy it holds as I go in for the kill. “But I guess that’s pretty cool, right? You know…to, like, know who you’re gonna end up with and everything at eighteen. While we’re all fucking around with random chicks, and whatever.” I let out a short laugh. “I mean, most of us frogs have to screw a fuck of a lot of princesses before we turn into a prince. Some of us aren’t prince material at all.” I gesture to myself.
Falco continues to stare, and I can practically see his mind spin like the predictable asshat he is. It’s fucking pathetic. This guy is nowhere near good enough for Beth, and even though a part of me really does hope he does right by her for her heart’s sake, there’s also the part of me that can’t stomach the thought of the two of them ending up together. And, of course, there’s the fact that he in no way deserves her. It’s infuriating, and I blow out a slow breath before I let the fucked-upness of it all rile me up and show my hand.
Instead, I stay cool as a motherfucking cucumber on the outside, and I finish him. “I can’t imagine being with only one girl from the time I’m eighteen. Good for you.” I keep my tone calm and casual, looking back out over the pool. After all, I’m not trying to scare him—I’m trying to test him. If he’s sure about Beth, then my words won’t bug him out. But if he’s not, then he can’t steal this time from her. He’s either got to man up and figure out how he’s going to make this work, or let her go. And before he leaves for school. Anything else is selfish and fucked up on his part.
Because we all know how that goes—we’ve seen it happen over and over to the girls in our grade who had older boyfriends who weren’t all-in when they went to college. It would just lead to a year or more of fighting and tears until Falco finally cheated on her and broke her sweet, trusting heart. And then I’d have to kill him for real. I want to go to college next year, not prison.
“Seventeen.” His voice is so low I barely make it out.
“Huh?”
“I’m not eighteen for another couple months.”
I shrug. Even better. I don’t know a lot of guys who wouldn’t lose their shit over the thought of being with the same girl from the time he is seventeen until the day he dies, and if he’s one of those guys, then he shouldn’t be stringing Beth along.
“Whatever,” I murmur. “It’s not like she’s holding you back, right? You can focus on your classes and shit.”
“Yeah.”
“At least you’ll have your shit together. While the rest of us are wasting our time with one-night stands and meaningless hookups, you get to skip all that reckless shit. I mean take in Luce over there,” I gesture through the closed sliding glass doors, where we can see our mutual female acquaintance—one I happen to know Falco was particularly interested in before meeting Beth—lifting the hem of her top to flash some of the guys her bra. “Luce with her whole free-love, sexual exploration mission…” I roll my eyes. “Imagine how many chicks like that there will be in college.” My laugh is convincing enough.
I toss my cigarette into the remnants of someone’s drink and head inside. Falco stays outside with the rain and his thoughts, no protection against either, battered by both. He’s going to man up and commit to the girl he claims to love with eyes wide open, or he’s going to self-destruct. But it’s not his destruction I’m worried about. It’s Beth’s. And if Falco isn’t the guy for her, she’ll be much better off in the long run if she finds that out now. And if I can help that along, then all the fucking better.
About half an hour later, when the rain has cleared and most of the party has moved back outside, I find Luce alone in Cooper’s kitchen. “Hey there, Dave,” she smiles suggestively, swaying her hips as she approaches.
“Hi there, honey.” I flash her a smile, but when her fingers brush my thigh, I skirt the contact. “You know who needs a little attention?” I tell her. “Falco.”
Luce frowns. “Isn’t he still dating Beth Caplan?”
I shrug casually. “Is anyone really dating anyone, Luce? Come on.” I use her own lines against her. “What happened to love should be open and free?”
