"I was looking for them tonight. So we could go home. I overheard Robin talkin' with Marcus and their boys..." I trail off, remembering how Robin had said such sweet things... before saying that one horrible thing.
"And..." Cam prompts.
"Marcus said somethin' about me. How Robin ain't gettin' any because I'm like a nun. Robin defended me. He yelled at them not to even look at me because I was his. Basically that their girls were sluts, but I was the kinda girl he'd marry - pretty things, really..."
Cam rolls onto his side so he's looking down at me and I meet his gaze. There are tears in my eyes, I know, but they don't fall. "And then...?"
My voice comes out a whisper. "And then he said that just because he ain't gettin' any from me, doesn't mean he isn't gettin' any."
Cam stares down at me for a few moments. He reaches down and brushes away the one tear that wouldn't just stay put before breathing, "The son of a bitch."
I look away, ashamed. This is the crux of the issue: I don't want to do anything but kiss. There's something wrong with me. Me, not Robin. How could I expect him to only want me when I'm giving him nothing? I'm just not enough. How could I be?
When I glance back at Cam, he's quietly seething, I can tell.
Cam suddenly jumps from the bed. "I'm gonna fuckin' kill him," he growls.
"No, Cam," I go after him.
"Yes, Ror. That threat? It wasn't a threat, it was a fuckin' promise. I warned him not to hurt you. He fuckin' knew better!"
"It's not his fault!" I shout, the words flying from my mouth before I can even process them. Cam glares at me. "It’s... not." I shake my head. "He's been waitin' on me for months. I just wasn't ready. I can't expect him to... and I never asked him to either. I never told him I didn't want him seein' anyone else, never even brought it up. He didn't hurt me. It's... it's my fault," I murmur, defeated.
Cam takes two giant steps until he's right in front of me, and I'm once again struck by how inherentlymalehe is. So handsome, so big and strong. And so damn good to me.
He reaches up to swipe at my tears, then holds up his damp thumb for me to see. "See these? These tears, from these innocent brown eyes? These are because ofhim."His fingers whisper down my neck and land on my sternum, safely above the humble swell of my breasts. "This here? This is the sweetest, most beautiful heart in the goddamn world. And it's hurting. And that's because of him, too. He is the luckiest bastard on fuckin' earth, havin' a chance with my best friend in the world. And instead of cherishing that, he's goin' out with you, and messin' around on the side with some slut who couldn't hold a candle to you, Ror."
I say nothing. I just stare up at Cam, mesmerized.
"I warned him, Ror. He fuckin' deserves it," he murmurs before turning to his bedroom door. It takes me a moment to realize he means to go after Robin.
"No, please, Cam!" I latch onto his arm, and he turns back to me. I take advantage of his hesitation, stepping into his chest and banding my arms tightly around his waist. My ear is pressed up against his heart, which beats in double time with his outrage. I wait for him to calm, and he does, his breathing slowly returning to normal. His arms envelop me in safety and a lifetime of unconditional friendship.
"I'm so tired. I don't want to think any more tonight. Do you think we could just go to bed?" I plead with him.
Cam considers me and sighs. "Sure, Ror, but this ain't over. You go on and get into bed."
I obey immediately, utterly exhausted. Cam goes to the top shelf of his closet to retrieve his sleeping bag. I scoot over to what was my side of the bed when we were kids and flip open the covers. "Cam?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you think you can handle sleepin' in the bed with me?" My voice is small. I know it's not a normal request, but I just really need him right now.
Cam stares at me, conflicted. "You need me to hold you?"
I nod.
Cam blows out a long-winded sigh, and drops the sleeping bag to the floor. He pulls off his jeans and scoots in behind me, under the covers. He slides a strong arm under my neck and slings the other over my waist like it's the most natural thing in the world.
And the truth is, it feels like it is. I feel safe. I feel loved. Cam's warm breath kisses the back of my neck, and I breathe in the sweet, clean, masculine scent that is only him, and it comforts me in a way only he ever could. I cuddle back against him. He presses his lips to my hair.
"Night, Ror," he whispers.
"Night, Cam. I love you."
I can both hear and feel his sharp intake of breath. "Me too, Ror."
****
