“I had no idea of his existence until after his mother died.” The Duke took a step toward her, one hand extended as if he was trying to calm her. “That was when your father found me and told me the truth.”
“I knew of the boy when he was born,” her father sighed with regret. “But I was sworn to secrecy. Which I meant to keep, until the death of the boy’s mother. Once she passed away, I knew that I had to tell the Duke the truth of it.”
“And once I learned who he was, I knew that I had to act.” The Duke took another step towards Yvette, and she took one back. “I considered sending him to a boarding school, but that idea held little merit. The real problem came down to who he was, and what I would tell people.”
“What does it matter whose son he is?” The confusion was real and she tried desperately to search her way through it. “Why the lies?”
“Reputation,” the Duke said with a sneer of his own. “As my son, most would look down on me, and they would judge me for what I did. But as I am not married, as I did not commit adultery, it would cause little uproar. As has been proven. But if it was learned that my father had a lovechild…” A shake of the head. “It would destroy his legacy.”
“So, it was to protect you,” she said. “Everything you did was for your own –”
“No!” The Duke cried. “It is for Hugh. As my son, he will adopt my title, my lands, everything. That is why I did this.”
“But it’s not,” she pleaded as it call came together. “You just said yourself, that it was to protect your reputation. You…” She looked at the Duke with sorrow, because he was a stranger now, and she did not know him. “You may tell yourself that you have done the right thing, and for the right reasons, but if that was the case, you would not have kept it a secret from me. You would not have worked so hard to hide it.”
“I had no choice. For Hugh –”
“For you,” she pressed. Yvette wasn’t angry, she realized. She wasn’t maddened, nor did she feel betrayed. Rather, she was disappointed, because the Duke was not the man who she thought, and that hurt more than she could possibly comprehend. “You did it for yourself, Your Grace. Yes, Hugh will benefit, I do not deny it. But that was not what drove your decision.”
“I…” The Duke could not bring himself to look at her.
“Tell me that I am wrong.” Her voice was soft and defeated. “Look me in the eyes and tell me I have it wrong. Please…” Her chin began to wobble. “You have found it so easy to lie to me until now, so what is one more lie?”
Yvette wasn’t upset that the Duke lied to her. She wasn’t upset that her father lied to her. She wasn’t even upset that they had conspired together to keep this secret – that they had used her.
What upset Yvette the most was that the man who she thought to be the Duke, the same who she cared for and had fallen for, was not the man that he truly was. Even if his actions seemed pure, they were done for selfish reasons. He adopted Hugh not because he cared about the boy, but because he cared so deeply about what others thought of him. He did it to protect himself.
Never before had the gulf that existed between Yvette and the Duke felt so vast as it did right now, and that the Duke could noteven look at her, that he could not even defend himself… that told that she was right, and that he knew it to be true.
How could I have been so wrong about him? How could I have convinced myself of so many lies… ones I needed to believe to justify my feelings. I feel like a fool.
“I…” She took a step back, knees trembling. “I need to… I need to be alone.”
“Miss Norleigh…” He reached for her, but he did not try and stop her. He stood frozen in the room, one hand outstretched, shame written clear across his face. “I am so sorry.”
“I know that you are,” she said. “As am I.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
“That’s it!” Alistair cried joyously. “Both arms, just like that – don’t panic. Smooth, Hugh. Just like I showed you. And do not kick so hard!”
Alistair stood up to his waist in the body of water. It was colder than he had hoped, but the midday sun shone brightly and warm so that it did not matter. By where he stood, the water was calm, and it glimmered in the light as if a million diamonds floated on the surface and reflected in the light.
Just beyond his immediate vicinity, however, the water splashed and roared with vigor, foamy and white, it sprayed across his face and through his hair as if a dozen fish were flopping about in a bid to race away.
“Steady goes,” Alistair called out. “Long strokes. As I showed you…”
It was Hugh, who he was with. And where Alistair stood calmly with his arms folded across his bare chest, Hugh was attempting to swim for the first time.
To the boy’s credit, he wasn’t nearly as hopeless as Alistair had thought he would be. It might have been his first attempt to swim, but he was confident and assured, and he took to swimming with more grace and precision than he should have done.
A stark contrast to my first time trying to swim. I can still remember my father throwing me in, giving me no instruction, just expecting that I not drown…
The memory brought a darkness to the moment, as if a cloud had moved to block the sun. Alistair shook his head to remove it, focusing instead on his half-brother, and the joy he took in this particular activity. Indeed, despite his struggles, the constant wheezing and panting as water went up his nose and down his throat, Hugh’s laughter could still be heard clearly.
“Better,” Alistair cheered for Hugh as the boy swam in circles around him. “Look at you go!”
The joy that Alistair felt watching Hugh swim was beyond what he could have predicted. Hugh might have been his brother, but he felt in that moment more like his son. And Alistair was proud of him, such that he beamed for all to see… he wanted Hugh to see it.
