“I think that’s what I just said.”
For a while, they just watched as the boy and girl splashedand ran and laughed. When Claire realized that Jess was leftto circle the two like an ineffectual moon, she decided it wastime to get into the water herself.
Tony beat her to it. “Well,” he said as he stretched hisway to action, “I guess it’s about time to cool off out there,ya think?”
Claire swung her legs over the side of the chair. “I have to protect my son’s virtue,” she agreed.
Tony’s laugh was delighted. “I have to protect your son’svirtue, too. Come on.”
Claire hadn’t really thought about that limp of his. Usually it was so slight it simply looked like part of Tony’s slow,easy gait. But as he climbed to his feet today, he lurched,then cursed, then waited a second before straightening.
“Okay?” she asked, not knowing what else to offer.
His grin was dry as dust as he rubbed at his left hip. “It’sgonna rain like a pig any time soon,” he said, and then finished straightening.
Claire saw the scar there, snaking out beneath the hem ofhis shorts like a dirty secret. Old and raised and shiny. Therewere others on his chest, worse ones. Scars she hadn’t seenyet.
Tony held out a hand. “Let’s go. I’m going to need a headstart to bring down that daughter of mine.”
Claire took his hand, carefully raised her eyebrow. “Nosun tan today?”
Tony took a quick look down at the shirt he still wore.“Iusually leave my shirt on.” The shrug he offered was easyand matter-of-fact. “Been a long time since I’ve had toprove anything. I don’t need to make Jess uncomfortablejust to make a point.”
“You’re sure?”
He squeezed her hand, shot her a smile that should havebeen a kiss. Then he turned them both deliberately for the water. “I spent almost a year in the VA, Claire. After that,I didn’t have any shame left at all. Matter of fact, I was soused to people just walking in on me any time of day ornight, I had to remember to keep my clothes on when I gothome. I gave my sister Victoria the scare of her life one nightwhen I walked out of the shower during the middle of oneof her slumber parties. My mother went to Mass for amonth over that one.”
She was laughing again. How could she be laughing,when he was telling her just what those scars had cost him?How could he make her feel better when he was telling her that he didn’t in the least mind compromising his life?
Claire minded. She minded for him. She hurt for the manwho had lost his innocence to a war and his youth to hospitals. And yet he was telling her she wasn’t allowed to.
“Hey, Jess!” he was yelling as he stepped into the warmwater. “Reinforcements are on the way! I say we get ’em!”
The water lapped at Claire’s ankles, and she instinctivelysquinted down to the water to look for crabs and jellyfishthat might object to her arrival. Tony’s hand was warm andrough, his grip tight. Claire found the hurts of the past slipping behind her like the shore, until all she could think ofwas how delicious the water felt against her legs. How warmthe sun was. How hungry she’d been for the sound ofJohnny’s laughter. He turned toward his sister and her surprise champion with a shout of challenge, and the waterflew.
“You were right,” Johnny admitted as they climbed the bridge back to the mainland much later to find the distanthorizon cloaked in lightning-shuddered black.
“About what?” Tony asked.
“It is going to rain.”
Tony just nodded. “The farmers need it.”
Claire didn’t pay either of them much mind, except tonote that Johnny was beginning to let Tony closer. It mighthave had something to do with the fact that Johnny hadtaken to looking at Tony’s daughter like Helen incarnate, orthe fact that Tony approached her son with an attitude that resembled more big brother than adult.
Claire was glad. She was glad the day had been so nice.She was glad she was full of Peaches’s wonderful food andsleepy from the sun. She didn’t even mind the fact that herskin was already a little too tender. She felt sated. Comfortable. Her mind hummed with memories of bright eyes andlaughing faces and delicious sensations. Sunlight and thetickle of tiny fish against her ankles and the caress of aman’s hand.
It was enough to settle anyone to sleep. It settled Claire to sleep, her arms wrapped around Jess, who had insisted hermother ride in the back with her, much to Johnny’s chagrin. Much to both parents’ amused relief. Claire closed hereyes to the sounds of Motown on the radio and Tony talking to Gina about some family member or another who was mad at some other family member or another, and the humof tires on asphalt. She warmed herself on the weight of herchild and actually entertained the fantasy that maybe it wasn’t going to be so bad.
Maybe she could let this man just a little closer. Share a few more of the war stories that didn’t hurt. Allow herself the pleasure of his smiles. Maybe she could just fall a littlein love.
Just a little.
For the first time since it seemed she could remember,Claire actually toyed with hope. She slept with it all the wayback to the inn and woke to it for at least a few momentswhen Tony bent over her to pull a slumbering Jess from her arms. She considered it as she stretched out the cobwebs andlet Johnny hand her up out of the car.
In the distance, lightning fluttered along the edge of the sky. The wind was damp with the promise of rain. Claire turned her face to it and thought of how sweet the rainsmelled.
“Mom?”
