And even though Robbie and I went through this big, traumatic ordeal together, outside this hospital room, nothing’s really changed, has it?
He’s still engaged. I’m still moving on. Right?
“I’m good where I am, anyway,” I say as casually as possible. “You can go.”
Robbie’s jaw locks, and my heart rate monitor ticks up, wondering if he’s going to argue, but he lets Lissa drag him to his feet.
“I’ll be back,” he tells me, Terminator-style.
“You don’t need to—” I start.
The look he gives me is full of so much love and protective fire, I low-key worry I might incinerate on the spot.
“I said, I’ll be back, Ames. Don’t you dare try to get out of bed without calling for help.”
“I can?—”
“That wasn’t a question. Say, ‘Yes, Robbie.’ Say, ‘I understand, Robbie.’”
I open my mouth to argue, but another glance at his face makes me close it again. “Y-yeah. Okay.”
He nods once and follows Lissa out.
I swallow hard.
What the fuck just happened?It’s like there’s someone new inhabiting my best friend’s body. And whoever he is, he’s?—
“Scary-intense,” Auden breathes, staring after Robbie with wide eyes. “Just like I told you.”
This time, I don’t argue.
CHAPTER TEN
ROBBIE
I followLissa down the hall toward the elevator, but every step feels like I’m fighting gravity, pushing against a tide. Her hands are wrapped around my arm, and she’s talking—shekeepstalking—but her words wash over me without sinking in.
Maybe this is because I’m tired. I only snatched a few minutes’ sleep here and there last night, and even when I slept, part of my brain was always on alert in case Ames woke up.
But it’s also because I can’t stop thinking about Ames.
About the fire.
About him saying—pretty sure, at least—that he’s in love with me.
About how sure and bone-deep certain everything felt last night, and how that certainty eroded with the dawn. Why is it so much harder to be sure in the light?
“—the little lunch place on the corner since the cafeteria salads are probably awful, okay? Robbie? Are you listening?”
I blink at her. “Yeah. Sure. Cafeteria’s fine.”
“That’s not—” She frowns as we step into the elevator. “You know what, you’re right. Cafeteria it is. You need a meal and thenrest, mister.”
I grunt and jab the button for the third floor.
If Ames is in love with me, why’d he tell me to leave? Why’d he want to be with Auden? Why’d it take him nearly dying to tell me how he felt about me?
I back up on the last one almost immediately. I sure as fuck haven’t told him how I’ve been feeling, have I? And if he didn’t tell me… well, maybe it’s for some of the same reasons.
