As I look out at all the people, I’m hit with a sudden sadness that brings me to tears. “I wish Mom were here today.”
He tenses, then sighs. “Don’t cry. You’ll ruin your makeup. And your mother is gone. She left me years ago and has never been seen since.”
Meaning she’s probably dead. And I’ve always suspected it was because of my father.
I remember the way they would fight. Even though I was young at the time, I would sit on the stairs where they couldn’t see me and listen to them scream at each other for hours. Eventually one day, I saw my mother leave the house and she never came back.
But I always thought it was strange that she didn’t bring a suitcase with her. She left the house like she had planned to come back.
Come back for me.
But she never did. And my father never tried to get her back. Knowing how controlling he is, that always surprised me. She was just… gone.
As I got older, I questioned it all in my head and I realized that she’s probably dead. There’s no way my mom would have not taken me with her. There’s no way she would have left me alone with my father.
I’ve never had the courage to ask my dad about this as I’ve worried he might hurt me. I’ve always felt a simmering anger under my father’s surface that I haven’t wanted to penetrate. It’s just been easier to lock myself away in my room.
“Stop crying now, Natasha,” he snaps. “I need you to look pretty today. Your husband will be expecting that. And your mother left us so she’s to blame for your tears right now.” He hands me a handkerchief and I wipe at my tears, trying my best to control them.
Once I manage to stop crying and all of our guests are inside the chapel, my father opens the door and gives me his hand. I have no choice but to take it.
My legs are numb as we walk to the chapel. This is really happening. I’m going to be married within minutes and I still don’t know what my husband looks like.
My father grips my arm tightly in his – making sure I don’t run or cause a scene and embarrass him – when the chapel doors open and the music starts.
The first thing I notice is how beautiful the room is. Soft light filters in through the glass ceiling. The air smells like sunshine and flowers from the garden outside. The guests sit on either side of the aisle made out of flowers. It’s like something out of a fairytale.
And yet, this feels like a nightmare.
That’s when I raise my head to look down the aisle at the man standing there. A young man, probably a decade older than me at the most. At least he’s not old, I tell myself. Though, if he’s mean, then that means I’ll be stuck with him longer.
Dark hair sits on his head and stubble lines his face. Striking good looks. Handsome and tall and powerful. He looks like he stepped out of a romance novel.
His eyes widen when he looks at me. What does he think? Does he like what he sees or does he hate it? I don’t even know what this man sounds like.
The soft music swells throughout the room as me and my father walk down the aisle. My large dress barely has room to fit. It makes my face flush.
When I reach the end of the aisle, my father promptly takes my hand and holds it out to the man. Maksim Petrov.
But Maksim doesn’t move right away. Instead, he stands there frozen for a moment before stretching out his hand and taking mine. The moment his hand closes over mine I feel like I’m doomed to a life I didn’t choose.
Maksim gently tugs me up the stairs until I’m standing right before him. His eyes search my face and I’m not sure what he finds there.
And then he stumbles, like he lost his balance. That’s when I smell the faint scent of alcohol coming off of him. My dad has had his fair share of wine so I know what it smells like.
Is he… drunk? I wonder. Did this man really come to our wedding wasted?
The crowd murmurs. Maksim smiles sheepishly. A man in the front pew – the older one I remember seeing that day at my house – glares at him.
“Shall we begin?” the priest asks.
“Let’s get this over with,” Maksim mutters so quietly, I’m sure I’m the only one who can hear him. But his words make me flinch. I don’t think he wants this, I realize. Neither do I but instead of finding comfort in that, I only feel alone. This man wants nothing to do with me.
And before I can stop myself, my tears hit me all over again and I cry before the entire chapel of guests.
Chapter Three
Maksim
