Daniel couldn't help studying the delicate hands with slender, yet strong and skilled fingers that massaged his shoulder yesterday andbuttoned his shirt twice today. He ached to pull her hands into his and press his lips to her knuckles.
Instead, he grabbed his water glass and took a long drink.
"Uncle James offered me a job."
It was all he could do to not spit water all over the table and Riley. Finally, he managed to swallow it all and clear his throat. "He did? That's great." He pressed a napkin to his mouth before crumpling it into a tight ball. "Are you going to take it?"
"I want to. I'll feel bad leaving Dr. Nelson, but your injury has made me realize how much I've missed practicing medicine."
"So, you're planning on staying here long term?" He held his breath, waiting for her answer.
A rosy tint covered her cheeks as she smiled. "I'm not as opposed to the idea as I was years ago."
"Why not?"
"You're here." She shrugged as though that said it all, and the light that he loved to see filled her eyes.
Daniel's heart leaped in his chest. Did he dare hope there could be a future for them? Here in Providence. Together.
But she deserves better than you.
Two voices had warred in his head all week. One, telling him he was an idiot for walking away from Riley, and the other constantly reminding him he wasn't good enough for her.
On one hand, he felt if he had Riley by his side, it wouldn't be difficult to stay sober. On the other hand, he knew his past could come back to haunt them at any moment. And not just the addiction part of his past.
They'd talked in depth at last week's AA meeting about making restitution for their wrongs. It was something Daniel couldn't do, no matter how badly he wished he could. He couldn’t bring back little Isaac, nor could he track down the women he’d slept with—women whose names he didn't even remember—to make sure they weren’t bearing a burden he should share. He mentally kicked himself again for all the poor choices he'd made over the past two and a half years.
Riley locked gazes with him. "I think I'd be willing to stick aroundif there was more than a job for me here." Her voice was heavy with innuendo as she blinked, fluttering her lashes.
Daniel's mouth went dry. "You think?"
"I'd love to stay in Providence if I could convince a certain someone to give us a chance."
He wanted to give them a chance. More than he wanted a stiff drink, which was saying something. Because just like that craving never went away, he knew he'd never stop loving Riley. But this was not the time or the place to discuss his reservations with her.
"Alright, here we are." Amy stepped up to their table, arms loaded.
Daniel sighed. Amy's timely arrival saved him from having to respond, but it also put a scowl on Riley's face.
No, I'm the one who disappointed Riley. Not Amy.
"I have a turkey bacon club for you, Riley." Amy placed a plate in front of Riley. "And here's your BLT, Daniel." She stepped back and smoothed her hands down the front of her apron. "Is there anything else you need?"
"Not at the moment." Riley gave Amy a tight smile. "Thanks."
"I'll let you enjoy your lunch then." Instead of walking away, however, she put her hands on the table and leaned down. "Can I just say how happy I am that the two of you are back together again? You make a very attractive couple." Then she smiled, winked, and walked away.
It was just as well she didn't wait around to hear that they weren't actually back together, because by the way Riley kept blinking, he figured she was seconds away from bursting into tears.
He felt like such a heel for not being able to give her what she wanted. Especially when he wanted it too. He reached across the table and grabbed her hand as she went for her sandwich. Leaning as close as the table allowed, he glanced around before speaking to make sure there weren't any eavesdroppers.
"I would love to give us a chance Riley, but I'm no good for you. You deserve?—"
"Stop saying that!" Her words came out as a hiss. "You don't get todecide what I do and do not deserve." Her voice had risen by the time she finished speaking.
An older couple in the process of sitting at a nearby table stared at them.
Daniel released her hand and sat back in his chair. "You're right. But I don't think you understand the full ramifications of getting mixed up with me."
