"What?" His mouth dropped open, and he fell back a step.
"I need to know.... If I'm ever going to be able to handle....physical touch and...any kind of intimacy again."
He scrubbed a hand over his jaw, his stubble making a rasping sound. "Wow. I was not expecting that."
"I'm afraid I'm always going to be repulsed by advances from men." She rubbed at her arms, recalling the way her skin had crawled when the cocky cowboy propositioned her.
"It's not something you should rush into, Ri. It's only been a little over a month since..." He let his words die off. "Give yourself more time to heal, and I'm sure you'll be fine."
"But what if I'm not? What if I always freak out any time a man gets close?"
"You don't freak out anymore when I get close." To prove his point, he stepped a little closer.
Riley's breath hitched in a good way.
"You held my hand last week at the cabin and tonight in my truck without freaking out. And you hugged me last Saturday. You're making progress. Someday, when you've had more time to heal, you'll have the opportunity to build trust as you grow into a relationship with someone." Tension deepened his voice. "When that happens, I'm sure you'll be able to handle the physical stuff just fine."
But I want that man to be you.
She couldn’t convince Daniel to give them a second chance if she couldn’t stand to be kissed by him. Knowing how he struggled, she didn't want to make things harder for him, but she wanted to start building a relationship with him now. This time, she wouldn't walk away.
"That's why it has to be you." She inched closer to him and took his hand. "We've known each other forever. I trust you like I've never trusted another man. I know you'd never hurt me."
He let out a tense chuckle. "I kind of walked into that one, didn't I?" He ran his fingers through his hair. "What I meant was?—"
"I know this is asking a lot of you, but you gave me my first kiss."
Amusement lit his face, and he pointed a finger at her. "No,yougave me your first kiss. You practically attacked me."
She punched his arm. "I did not."
"You did too.”
"But you kissed me back." Her voice softened. "You gave me my first kiss..." She lowered her gaze to their interlocked fingers. "And I need you to kiss me now to show me I'm not permanently damaged and broken. That I’m capable of having a relationship."
Daniel sucked in a sharp breath. "Riley." The husky timber of his voice sent a shiver down her spine.
"Three years ago, I welcomed your kisses and your touch. If I can't.... tolerate that from you again, I'm not sure I'll ever feel comfortable with any man." She added that last bit so Daniel wouldn't feel like she put too many expectations on him.
"It has taken us a long time to get to this level of...comfort with each other this summer." His voice was gentle and warm as he ran his thumb over her knuckles. "If I kiss you and you're...repulsed by it..." He rubbed his free hand over his jaw again. "I don't think my sobriety can handle a repeat of what we went through earlier this summer. Especially if you knee me in the groin again."
"I won't, I promise." She leaned toward him a little. "Just one kiss. Please."
"For the record, I think this is a bad idea. But heaven help me, I do want to kiss you." The low and rumbling words were a soft caress against her cheek. He shifted, closing the gap between them.
He lifted a hand and caressed her cheek then gently tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. Ever so slowly, he slid his fingers into her hair and brought them to rest at the nape of her neck.
Tingles raced across her scalp, and her lungs seized. Each beat of her heart pounded a little harder as though trying to push too much blood through her veins. A momentary flash of panic filled her mind until she reminded herself that her breathlessness and racing heartbeat were caused by desire, not fear.
His other hand gently settled on her waist as he slowly tilted his head toward hers.
Her eyes drifted closed, and moisture filled her mouth in anticipation of his kiss.
"How are you doing, Pockets?"
Her eyes flew open. "Fine." The single word was breathy and shallow.
He dipped his head a little lower until his warm breath caressed her lips. "Are you sure about this?" The low rumbling tone of his voice heightened her anticipation in an almost torturous way.
