He led her to the passenger door and opened it before he turned to look at her. The dome light inside the truck cast a pale glare on her face.
Man, she’s beautiful.
Robert cleared his throat and shoved his hands into his pockets. “I have a confession to make.”
Jessie looked at him, face full of trust, and a lump formed in his throat. His protective instincts kicked in, and he hoped he didn’t hurt her with his confession or make her upset her with his gift.
“I uh... I saw your journal at the cabin last week.”
Jessie lowered her eyes and wrapped her arms around herself, her posture guarded and tense.
Just thinking about the things he saw in that book made his stomach clench and his blood turn hot. “I didn’t mean to be nosy. I just... Man, it kills me, to know that you had to hide your feelings and all the abuse you suffered in those pages.”
Jessie lifted her head but didn’t make eye contact. A tear clung to her lower lash. “That was my only escape. I had to keep it hidden with the cleaning products.”
“I’m so sorry, Jess, for everything you’ve been through.”
She shook her head. “It’s not your fault. It’s mine.”
“No, it’s not. It’s that man’s. Don’t make excuses for him or try to accept the blame for the things he did to you.”
“Your right.” She brushed away the lone tear that had fallen on her cheek. “Can we please not talk about him, right now?”
Gladly.
Robert reached into the truck and pulled out the bag but didn’t hand it to her. “I don’t want you to take this the wrong way. I mean, I don’t want you to think I’m trying to influence you or rush you in finding yourself or anything.” He held the bag out to her. “I saw this and thought of you. I thought maybe you might like a journal that wasn’t so full of...pain and darkness.”
Jessie took the bag and pulled out the large journal. This one wasn’t black. It was yellow, and the cover was filled with bold pink roses, small purple pansies, and vibrant greenery. She dropped the bag and brought the book to her chest.
Her head lowered, and Robert couldn’t see her face.
Uh oh. Should I apologize?
Jessie’s shoulders shook and she sniffled.
Without thinking, he pulled her into his arms. “I’m sorry, Jess. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
She kept her head pressed against his shoulder as she mumbled through her tears. “You didn’t. It’s just that Emily gave me an assignment. I’m supposed to write down...something.” She sniffed. “But I couldn’t bring myself to write them in that book.”
“So, you’re not upset with me for giving you the journal?”
Jessie laughed, but didn’t lift her head. “No, in fact, this...” The arm holding the journal shifted against his stomach. “I mean, you just reminded me, again, that God is mindful of me.”
He tightened his arms around her. “He is, Jess.”
And so am I.Robert couldn’t seem to make it through his day without thinking about Jessie a dozen times every hour.
More tears soaked his shirt as Jessie let go of...what? Fear? Feelings of unworthiness? Grief?
He didn’t know, but he hoped these tears were healing and would help her move forward.
Gradually, the tears stopped, and her shoulders slumped. Her body relaxed and melted into him. The attraction Robert had fought all evening kicked into overdrive, and he was aware of her perfume weaving an intoxicating web around him. The warmth of her body pressed against his lit a fire inside him, warming him from the inside out.
The desire to press his lips to hers was almost too much to bear. If he did, he’d regret it. One kiss would never be enough, and he couldn’t get lost in Jessie’s arms or her kisses again.
He brought Jessie here to help her find herself. Of course, he hoped she’d choose to stay in Providence, too. He did not bring her here to get lost in her honey-colored eyes. He couldn’t afford to let himself get caught up with her emotionally. If he let himself fall for her again and she left, he’d never recover.
Despite telling himself this, he slowly stroked his hands up and down her back.
