“I was busy. We had a lot going on. Besides, it was a hairline fracture. It’s not like my hand was dangling or anything.”
“Of course not,” she said, her tone full of sarcasm. “But you love it don’t you?” Her tone change to one of reverence. “You love the ranch, the animals?”
“I do,” he said with conviction. “I think I would go insane if I could no longer work with my hands, work with animals, and work the land.”
An unexplained sadness crept over her. The story of her life lately. There were so many things she wanted to do but couldn’t.
Jake must have noticed a change in her countenance because he stroked her hair in a gesture of comfort. “Hey, what just happened? Are you thinking about your brother?”
“No, actually I was thinking about my life. I’m trying to remember if I’ve ever felt that kind of passion for anything.”
“You got a doctorate degree, which I’m sure wasn’t easy. I imagine you feel passionate about helping people work through their problems.”
“Maybe. I guess I don’t really view it the same. I mean, watching you with that horse. That was amazing.”
“I think what you are doing with Daniel is amazing. When everything is resolved, and life gets back to normal, I bet you’ll realize how much your work means to you.”
Emily didn’t welcome trying to find a normal without her brother. “I hope you’re right. It’s hard to deal with this grief and not be able to physically work off its effects.”
Jake lifted her chin and held her gaze. “You had a nightmare last night, didn’t you?”
She looked away. Last night’s nightmare had been especially bad, and she’d wished Jake had been there to hold her and chase away her fears. But she couldn’t run to him every time she had a hard time.
”Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You know why,” she whispered.
Emily pushed backward to get off his lap. Though he acted reluctant to let her go, he helped her shift, keeping her legs across his lap when she attempted to lower them. She looked at his face to see if he was teasing her. The intensity of his gaze surprised her.
“I want to help you through this difficult time, Emily.”
“You can’t spend the night in my bed every night to keep the nightmares away.”
“I wish I could,” he said, his voice low. “It hurts me to see you struggling, and there is nothing I can do to help you.”
“You are helping, Jake. Knowing you care, helps.”
“I do care, Emily. More than you know.”
Emily’s breath seized in her chest, and millions of tiny winged creatures took flight in her stomach. Jake held her gaze for a moment before she tore her eyes away.
Boy, am I in trouble!
She couldn’t fall in love with Jake, not while she was mourning. She expressed false emotions when she grieved. She couldn’t make Jake a casualty of her grief like she had Trent.
Jake stroked her hair again. “I wish there was more I could do.” He let out a frustrated sigh. “I’d love to find whoever is responsible so you can get some closure.”
“Me too.”
“But, Emily, you need to eat. You are too slender as it is.”
“I know, but food has no appeal.”
“If you could have anything you want tonight, what would you have. What’s your favorite comfort food?”
Emily thought for a moment, then a slow smile spread across her face. “Pizza from Gordiano's. It was mine and Cameron’s favorite Italian restaurant. They make the best pizza.”
“Then let’s go, tonight. I’ll take you to Gordiano's.”
