Gabi, who has been keeping an eye on Charlotte the whole time, pipes up. “But what do you want, Charlotte? What do you feel?”
Charlotte doesn’t answer right away. A million things happen in her mind, but she’s not sure which ones are true and which ones are worth saying out loud. Eventually, she turns her head to Gabi, and whispers: “I think I’m a lesbian.”
Gabi looks at her for a few seconds, baffled, and then dramatically covers her mouth with her hand. “Charlotte Norwich is a dyke?” she exclaims. She then drops the act and deadpans: “In other shocking news,bears shit in the woods, the pope is catholic, water is wet, and so is your p—”
“This is why I don’t tell you things,” Charlotte interrupts her, but Lou softens Gabi’s response by clarifying: “Gabi’s just telling you we’ve been keeping your seat warm. And we’re happy you finally decided to join the club.”
Charlotte rolls her eyes. “I’m not sure I necessarily wanted to join the club. I just want to—” She stops herself as soon as she realizes her answer has a shocking amount to do with Riley.
“You just want to—?” Gabi annoyingly reminds her to finish her sentence.
“Nope.”
“Oh yes. Tell us, dear, what is it that changed your mind?”
“Not saying it.”
“It helps if you say it out loud.”
“No, you just want to hear me say it.”
“Ha! So there is something to say.”
Charlotte scrunches her face. “I’m about to strangle you.”
“Kinky. So, are you in love with Riley?” Gabi powers through.
Before Charlotte can fire something back, Lou intervenes.
“You don’t have to tell us, Charlotte. As long as you’re going to be honest with yourself and with Riley.”
Charlotte turns her head around to Lou and smiles. “I’m so glad Gabi’s about to marry a reasonable person,” she says.
“Oh, I don’t know about reasonable,” Lou mumbles, looking at her guiltily. “But if you don’t tell us until after the wedding, I’m getting my 20 bucks back.”
“I hate you both.”
Charlotte spends the better part of the night in bed thinking. She tries to ignore the empty feeling which has a lot to do with the absence of Riley next to her for the first time in days.
It had taken some careful planning to get back to her room without the risk of being seen by her, and yet the lack of a text or any other form of contact initiation from Riley speaks loudly. She feels both rejected and validated by it.
Her stomach has been swirling uncomfortably ever since she left the dinner. Not even twelve hours ago she and Riley had been devouring each other; she never would’ve expected everything to crumble down so fast, ultimately leading to her somewhat prompt and clumsy coming out to her friends. If it even deserved the title of coming out—it seemed Charlotte herself had been the only person to be surprised about it.
When she wakes the next morning, the day before the wedding, her head throbs painfully knowing she’ll have to spend time around Riley again. They are expected torehearse the ceremony in the backyard of the hotel once the officiant arrives, so there is no way she can bail. Not that she needs to—they can do the rehearsal, no problem. It’s not like she and Riley have a reason to fight, or to be less than civil with each other. As long as Riley acts normal, everything is fine.
Unless,Charlotte muses as she tries to wash her insecurities away in the shower,Riley has come to her own conclusions.What if Riley has decided she is finally done with Charlotte being a baby gay? Maybe Charlotte’s antics have reached a limit, which has not just made her undateable, but unlikeable to Riley. That would make a lot of sense, especially with Riley telling Hannah about her lack of interest in dating.
Now that she thinks about it: why had Hannah asked in the first place? Isn’t she married, and to a man? But then again, if Charlotte can do a sudden sexual one-eighty in her thirties, it can happen to anyone; even obnoxious mothers of twins. Who knows, Hannah could’ve been into women for a while, steering clear from the disadvantage of being a baby gay.
So if that’s what it was, maybe it was all a ruse. What if Hannah and Riley had meant for Charlotte to listen in on their conversation, so Riley wouldn’t have to let her down later? Were they already seeing each other before Mexico? Would Charlotte consider attending if she got an invitation to their wedding next?
To save her nervous system and her stomach, she skips breakfast and opts to mope with her nose in Shaky’s fur instead. It isn’t until she receives a—weirdly formal, thank you very much—text from Riley that she feels compelled to leave her room, if only because she knows that the consequences of not showing up will be bigger than if she stays inside.
'Officiant = here. Meet you out back?'
With lead in her sandals, Charlotte makes her way downstairs and follows the sandy path leading to the large garden on the lot behind the hotel.
She takes in the open, grassy space, sporting a white gazebo in the center. A few stacks of folding chairs on either side of the path are ready for distribution, with a set of rolled up carpets placed on top of one of them. Two women by the gazebo are busying themselves with rearranging the flowers. Charlotte doesn’t need to walk closer to see who it is, but unfortunately, she has to.
