“Do not fuck with me right now, Charlotte Norwich.”
“What? What is it? You’re really stressing me out, damn!”
“We’ve already established you’re a dick today, but I had no idea you were capable of being actually fucking stupid.” Charlotte spreads her palms open, compelling her to elaborate.
“First, you send Riley the most offensive, and let’s not forget, weirdly political text I’ve ever seen from you. And then you go and rub it in her face? You’re my best friend, Charlotte, but I can’t allow you to treat people like that.”
“What am I rubbing in her face? Not everything is about her.”
“Alright, let’s put our victim caps to the side and put our thinking caps on for a second. What message do you think your behavior is conveying?”
“What message? I… ugh.” Charlotte leans back against the brick wall. “I told her I am not interested in women, so how and why is it offensive to kiss a man?”
Gabi, who had been standing across from Charlotte, now turns around to lean against the wall next to her. “What exactly are you trying to prove?” she asks, her voice softer now.
“Prove? I have nothing to prove.”
“Oh, is that right? Because in my opinion, there are two scenarios here. One—,” she lifts a finger, “...you are in deep, deep denial. Or two—,” she lifts a second finger,“...you’re an asshole who toys with people’s feelings for fun. And I outright refuse to believe it’s the second one, so I think you’ve got some work to do.”
Charlotte shakes her head in disbelief, leaning her head back. “I already told you, that kiss was a one time—”
“Don’t give me the one time thing bullshit, I am not buying that anymore. Look, your sexuality is your business and no one else’s, until it starts affecting other people. And it does. I mean, look at what you’re doing to Riley. Fuck, look at what Riley does to you. I know it’s not my place—,” she throws up her hands, “...but there are definitely some… unresolved feelings there. I know you.”
“Oh, do you?” Charlotte spits, feeling her eyes start to glaze over. “Because it fucking feels like you’re pushing me in a direction I’m not interested in at all. It’s almost pathetic. How desperately do you need all of your friends to be gay? Is being an ally not enough?”
“If only you would behave like an ally. That text was outright homophobic.”
“Oh, come on—”
“Do you want me to read it back to you?”
“I’m good.”
“That’s what I thought.”
They stay in silence for a while, Charlotte’s mind going hundreds of miles per hour. She isn’t comfortable at all with the way Gabi is interfering; it feels like everyone is teaming up on her. Can’t they see that they’re all wrong?
Gabi takes a deep breath and turns her head to Charlotte. “Can you look me in the eye and tell me you’re not aware of the fact that Riley likes you?”
Charlotte looks back at her—challenge accepted—but as soon as she sees the sincerity in Gabi’s eyes, she’s lost. No, she knows it’s true. And she doesn’t have to say it; Gabi sees it.
“So then why did you kiss her?” she asks, her voice a caring whisper.
“Because I… I thought it was fun in the heat of the moment, and…” Charlotte scrambles for words, but she hears what it sounds like and it feels wrong.
“No, because we… because it felt right at the time?”
Gabi cocks an eyebrow, spurring her on as to say she’s almost there.
“Because I… fuck,” Charlotte groans, covering her eyes with one hand. She knows the answer.
It’s because she really, really fucking wanted to.
And that must be why it happened. Because if Riley actually liked her, she wouldn’t have given in to the kiss unless she thought Charlotte liked her back. So if Riley had given in, and then Charlotte had told her things like'getting it out of her system'and'not thinking any less of her', then… yes. She had been patronizing, and more importantly: a hypocrite.
“Imagine making out with someone, only for them to tell you they don’t think any less of you for doing it. It takes two people to kiss, you know.”
“But that still doesn’t make me gay, Gabi. I just… for one drunken second I might've been into Riley, who just happens to be a woman.”
