He slumped further. It wasn’t difficult; the chair was sized for children. It barely hit the middle of Jem’s back, so when he flopped his face toward the ceiling, he felt a little like an upside-down starfish. “See, I haven’t, uh—I haven’t gotten him off, but….”
“Okay, wait.” Metal chair legs dragged against the ugly carpet of the music room floor as Tori pulled one around to straddle backwards. “He’s paying you, buying you presents,andgiving you orgasms?” She shook her head. “My mom was right. I should’ve been a sugar baby.”
“Hilarious.”
Tori reached out and prodded his foot with the toe of her shoe. “Hey. What’s going on in your head? Talk to me.”
He exhaled gustily. “I don’t know! I mean, I like him. Like I really—he’s a whole mess, he needs so much therapy, but he’s kind and he’s generous and I think he really—”
Tori waited. When Jem didn’t immediately continue, she prompted gently, “He really what?”
“I think he’s lonely,” Jem said quietly. “I think he really needs somebody.”
He knew she’d pick up on what he didn’t say. Jem’s need to be needed was a documented phenomenon. His mother had needed him, once upon a time, when it was just the two of them, but then she married his stepdad; his father had only needed him when Andrew got hurt. In college he and Tori needed each other, but she had Ivy now. As she should.
His kids needed him, but it wasn’t enough.
“Jem,” Tori said, in that quiet way like her heart was breaking. “You can’t just—”
“Can’t what?” he challenged.
“Can’t just—fall in love with some guy because he needs you.”
Yes, I can. I’m already halfway there.“Why not? People fall in love for dumber reasons.”
Her expression went stormy. “I just… I don’t want you to get hurt. I wish you’d set your standards a little higher, you know? I mean, what happens when he doesn’t need you anymore?”
Jem would go back to his life, nurse his wounds for a little while, fill the void the best he could with work and friends, and just… move on. “The same thing that happens when anyone doesn’t need me anymore.”
“Jem.”
“I’m a grown man, Tori. I know what I’m getting into, okay?”
Tori didn’t look happy about it, but she didn’t argue. “Fine. But I’m laying in a supply of Ben & Jerry’s.”
“I would expect nothing less.”
“Okay.” She nodded once, and then her demeanor changed completely. “So. The orgasms.”
Fuck. His face went hot again. “It was just the one.”
“Mm-hmm. And?”
He scratched the back of his neck. “I mean, it was definitely the hottest bathroom handy at a Hollywood party I’ve ever had.”
“You little slut!” she squealed. “I’m so proud of you. You needed that.”
“Jesus Christ, could you make up your mind about my sex life?” he laughed.
“Fuck off. I contain multitudes. And so do you, apparently. Never thought you’d be the type.”
Yeah right. “You absolutely did,” Jem said. “You signed me up for this. You’re basically my pimp.”
“Okay, well I didn’t think you’d be so good at getting unreciprocated orgasms.” She paused and furrowed her brow. “Actually I’m not sure I should be proud of you for that.”
“Believe me, I tried to return the favor,” Jem muttered. “I mean, you saw the dress, right?”
“I did see the dress. If I had smaller tits and more disposable income, I would own the dress.” She leaned back a little, assessing. “So like, is it the semi-public factor that did it for you, or was it something else?”
