My past.
“Nothing,” I replied with a weak smile and a wave of my hand. “He talked a lot about horses. Like so, so, so much.” That earned me a snort, but Troy’s focus remained on the road. “But that’s what men do, right? All my friends back home talk about the first dates they’ve been on where the guy talks the whole time.” A slow shake of my head. “At least he wasn’t trying to get me to invest in crypto.”
“That’s what American men talk about?” he asked, the incredulity apparent in his voice.
“Australian men too, I bet,” I replied, my hands raking through my hair. The strands felt stiff, unnatural, all the effort I’d gone into blowing my hair out seeming like a waste now. “It’s this whole thing.”
“So… is it supposed to be a way to impress a girl?” That frown he’d worn since the moment he strode out of the pub justgot deeper. “But if he’s trying to get you to invest… I don’t get it. That’s not even him flashing money around, making you think he’d be a good provider.”
“No.” My hands fell limply into my lap. “No, it’s not and I don’t understand it either, so I can’t explain why it’s a thing. Some guys use dates as a sales pitch, trying to get you to invest in their favourite crypto coin, then angling for a blow job afterwards.” His splutter then sound of disgust was what emboldened me. “According to my friends, some guys make dates a test. If you order expensive things or don’t offer to pay for half, they say they’re going to the bathroom, only to dine and dash.”
“Mackenzie…”
He dared a sidelong look at me, then was forced to stare back at the road.
“But…” I hadn’t spoken to anyone other than Mom or my therapist about what happened and now surely wasn’t the right time. When? my heart demanded. When would I be allowed to share this pain? “But you don’t get it. Beau was never going to be able to hurt me. He couldn’t, not after Alex.”
It was my turn to stare fixedly at the road now, the glare of the headlights a welcome thing.
“Beau didn’t spend his life saying he loved me. He didn’t try and stop me from having male friends, wanting me to check in every time I went out with my girlfriends, but refused to come along and have fun. Only to ask me to hike up to the top of a waterfall one weekend.”
My throat bobbed, suddenly sore. The words felt like they clawed their way out of me, unable to be kept down again.
“The mist created a rainbow behind his head as he got down on one knee.” My hand flexed, still able to feel the ghost of my engagement ring. “And he asked me to marry him. Alex was my best friend for so damn long, so he knew just what to say tomake everything perfect.” I nodded slowly. “Except for I do. He couldn’t say that. The wedding was a couple of weeks away when he told me that he didn’t want to get married, didn’t want me.”
That low growl had me smiling despite myself.
“So you see, you didn’t need to come out and protect me from Beau. There is literally nothing he could do to hurt me. Bore me, maybe? Make me wish I’d just stayed at the farm and fed the new joey a bottle. God, shovelling wombat shit was better than that date. Beau couldn’t hurt me, because I don’t have a heart left to break. Just… fragments.”
The car stopped abruptly and bouncing forward was enough to bring me back to the here and now. What the fuck was I doing, vomiting up all my pain…? My door was wrenched open again, but this time it was for entirely a different purpose. The seatbelt was unclipped and then I was yanked out of my seat and into his arms.
Whoa.
Hands landing on a hard chest, the feel of cotton washed soft, and the ragged sound of his breath, every detail came rushing in along with a realisation.
Troy Drysdale was hugging me.
All the therapy, crying, and pints of ice cream were nothing compared to this. Going limp in a man’s arms and feeling him taking over. Holding me close, hand stroking through my hair over and over, until they snagged on a knot.
“He… Whoever the fuck he was, he was a bloody idiot.” I felt the rumble of his words rather than heard them. “I was ready to walk into that pub and punch Beau’s teeth down his throat if he looked at you wrong, but now I know I need to get on a plane.”
“Why?” I squeaked out.
“I know someone in the government who can get me a visa at short notice,” he continued, his voice hoarse. “Pretty sure I could be in California in a day or two.”
“To see the sights?” I asked, glancing up.
“To track down the arsehole who hurt you and break every damn bone in his body, so he thinks twice about ever treating a woman like that again.” His lips twitched into the tiniest of smiles. “Or is it asshole?”
Mom thought going out on a date would help heal me, and in some ways she was right. The giggle that bubbled up inside me, it felt like a spring bursting up through earth that had gone dry and dusty. It hurt a little at first, then… relief. That had me laughing in earnest and Troy joined me, if a little confused.
“If committing acts of violence was all it took to put a smile on your dial, Mackenzie, you shoulda just said.”
“No.” I recovered slowly. “No need to jeopardise Australian-American diplomatic relations on my account, but…” A long shuddering breath and then I forged on, “But people have said a lot about Alex, but no one threatened to beat his ass for me. Apparently, that’s just what I needed.”
“If you want to discuss creative ways to make this prick hurt, I’m your guy.” His smile faded. “But if he owes you an apology, so do I.” My eyebrows shot up because the words seemed equally hard for him to say. “You came down here to get away from one arsehole, only to walk face first into another one.”
“You,” I said, unable to stop myself from grinning.
