As much as she’d love to sit there and throw barbs at his head, she had to get ready for the day ahead. She had a lot of questions to ask, and no idea what to expect.
Chapter Forty-Two
“Whoa there, Gamehen, I’m not as good at this as I look.”
Haven’s nervous remark chafed his nerves.
Her words and tone weren’t irritating, but whenever she spoke, her voice did things to him he’d rather not dwell on.
She was sitting sidesaddle, one knee tucked around the pommel, her chin sticking out straight in adorable stubbornness, her hands strangling the reins, and her face a portrait of focus and mild alarm. Her lack of riding instruction was obvious, especially riding as she was. He could only assume that in the future, women shunned all notions of propriety and rode astride, in buckskins, in full view of all and sundry.
His mind conjured up images of her legs clad in tight fitting buckskins, legs spread wide, and her body rocking with the loping motion of the horse beneath her.
He groaned.
God, even the image of her riding a horse made him hard.
Shifting in his own saddle, he attempted to readjust his growing erection.
Uncomfortable, and angry at the direction of his thoughts, he ground out, “Maybe if you didn’t try to choke the horse with herown reins, she wouldn’t act as though she were being led to the slaughterhouse.”
Haven snorted, but didn’t take her focus from the area over Gamehen’s ears.
“Maybe riding a horse wasn’t such a good idea. I told you I didn’t know how to ride.” Her pinched voice carried a note of petulance.
She blamedhimfor her lack of riding skills?
“If you didn’t want to ride, you only had to say no.”
Her laugh was flat and irritated. “Sure, I could have said no, but then you’d turn your dark, angry look on me.”
“What dark, angry look? I wasn’t angry. I was reasonable, and cordial, and accommodating—everything you’d expect me to be.”
His mild discomfiture quickly turned to confused exasperation.
“Like hell,” she barked. He blinked in surprise. “I didn’t expect you to be reasonable, or cordial, oraccommodating.” She spat the last word. “I expected you to be caring, maybe ask me how I was feeling, ask me if I slept well, or if I’d slept at all. I expected you to tell me you couldn’t stop thinking about me, about what we’d done, about how it felt to be with me. I expected you to come into the room and...well...I don’t know what I expected. I guess I can’t expect much from someone who is in love with a dead woman.”
He halted his horse, and turned in the saddle to pin her with his gaze.
She pulled her horse to a stop beside his.
“What are you talking about?” She narrowed her eyes, her expression uncertain. “You expected me to walk into the breakfast room, take you in my arms, and kiss you like my life depended on it?”
Her face flushed, and she nodded.
“Why would I do that? You made it quite clear you regretted everything we did in my bed.”
She gave a slight head shake, and frowned.
“I madewhatclear? Other than asking you about the portrait, I didn’t say anything that could possibly make you believe I regretted what happened between us. You, however, didn’t say a single thing. I’d just experienced the most amazing orgasm of my life, and you couldn’t even utter a word. There was no, ‘it was great, baby,’ or ‘you rocked my world,’ or ‘I want to do it again.’ You just laid there like a log. A sad, anguished log. You didn’t even try to stop me when I left.” Raising her voice she demanded, “Why didn’t you try and stop me?”
She turned her face away, her proud chin quivering.
Sighing deeply, he reached over, gently pulling her chin around to face him. Her eyes were ringed with lashes thick with tears.
In a low, clear voice, he confessed, “Your expression spoke volumes. I couldn’t bear the look of shame and regret on your face. What could I have said to remedy the situation? I know you regret what happened between us, but I cannot regret how it felt to hold you against me, to taste you, to run my hand along your soft, sensitive skin, to slide into your tight, hot body.” He groaned. “To feel you as you came, then barely survive the most satisfying and soul-searing release of my life.”
He’d never been sovulnerable with her before, so open and raw. It pulled at her heart and inflamed something inside her.
