“Zay? You have no idea how glad I am to hear your voice,” I told her.
“Well, can you show it by letting us the fuck in?”
“Oh. Yeah. Sorry.” I bit my lip and pressed the button that opened the door downstairs.
Minutes later, Zainab and Alina climbed up the stairs and glared at me.
“What? What’s wrong?” I looked around, fully expecting to see a guy with his dick out, but of course I wasn’t in a horror movie, so there was no one here but me and my cats.
“Why aren’t you dressed?” Zay asked.
“I am?”
“You’re wearing PJs. Is he seriously wearing PJs?” Alina asked her girlfriend.
“What should I be wearing to go to bed?”
Alina grimaced.
“I don’t know, dude. You’re forty. Maybe just your pants?”
“It’s freezing. Are you kidding me?” I told her.
“Um… can we forget about the pajamas? Why aren’t you ready yet?” Zainab reached the top of the stairs, and I realized she was wearing the sparkly salmon-colored hijab, and her face was fully made up.
“Are you going somewhere?” I asked.
She turned to Alina and sighed. “I told you he’d bail.”
“Bail? Bail from what?”
Alina took Zainab’s hand to climb the last few steps and she caught her breath for a moment.
“The bachelor auction, dude! You promised us you’ll go,” she panted.
“The what?” I asked before it hit me, and it was my turn to groan. “Oh my God. Were you being serious about that?”
“Yeah!” they both shouted, causing me to jump.
“Oh come on, girls. I’m not in the mood,” I said.
“You’re never in the mood,” Zay said.
“Yeah, well, I’m doubly not so tonight.” I turned my back on them before anything on my face betrayed my Cinderfella mishap.
It seemed to be the wrong move because they both grabbed me and pushed me toward the bedroom where they proceeded to dress me up like a doll.
“I can’t believe this. I’m being kidnapped,” I said as they dragged me back out.
“Don’t give me ideas,” Alina said and turned to Zainab. “Maybe we should gag him with your scarf.”
Zay grimaced.
“I’m not putting this expensive scarf in his mouth. He can scream all he wants. He’s coming out with us.”
“This is America. I have rights.”
Alina laughed.
