“Oh, shoot.” Cole pulled away and breathed heavily. “I was supposed to slide in a question there.”
I laughed.
“What question?” I asked.
“Will you be my boyfriend?”
I laughed louder and pulled him back to me.
“Try to get rid of me,” I said and kissed him again.
Kissed my boyfriend.
My love.
My Cole.
33.Cole
Eleven months later
It was coming close to a year.
Close to a year since my life had changed for good. Since I’d met Samir.
It was surreal how fast things could change in such a seemingly short amount of time. My days had gone from work, sleep, repeat, to work, family time, love, and repeat in an instant. I couldn’t even remember how miserable I’d been before I met him. I didn’t want to remember. All I knew was that I didn’t want to go back to that.
And while sometimes I felt mad at myself for taking so long to pick my life back up after Sandra’s loss, I knew that even if I’d tried to do so before Samir, it wouldn’t have been the same. This… this thing between us, Samir and I, it was meant to be. Even if I’d had to go through hell first.
I still missed Sandra—God knew how much I missed her—but Samir helped me. He helped both of us by crafting stories, fairytales, where Ella’s mommy looked out for her and helped her in small little ways. We had even discussed him turning some of those stories into picturebooks to help other kids like Ella.
But he didn’t stop there. When we’d moved into his apartment over the bookstore he’d been the one who’d picked the best photos of Sandra to put up along with all our other family photos because she was a part of us wherever we were and however long it’d been.
It had only been a month since we’d settled in Samir’s apartment, and our life was beyond my wildest dreams.
Ella had proven a kitty whisperer just like her Sami, as she called him. She watched how he treated the rescues we brought home and copied his moves, his words, his facial expressions. It was adorable to witness.
And as for me, I hadn’t realized how much I’d needed my own space until I was out of my family home, that was now exclusively Enzo and Carson’s. My parents had found a small two-bedroom apartment to call home whenever they weren’t jetting off to another cruise, but even so, being in Samir’s place, it felt different. Like a fresh start. And wasn’t that exactly what I’d needed when I met Samir too?
I loved living with him, sharing my life with him, watching him read his books or light up whenever a kitten trusted him enough to make cookies on him or purr like a truck. I loved his food and I contributed as much as possible with my own recipes.
I also loved kissing him and making love to him. Being with him. Discovering new ways to pleasure each other. Finding out everything we liked and everything we hated. And I loved beingSamir’s first for all those experiments as well as those big moments like being his boyfriend or moving in together.
Maybe getting married one day.
There were a lot of things I loved about my life now, but mainly, it was that. That I was living. That I wasn’t sleepwalking my way through life, through fatherhood. That I had a reason to go on. Actually, two reasons. And they were enough to make me want to live forever just so I could love them both with all my heart and soul.
“Is everyone here?” Samir popped his head out of the kitchen door, and Carson did a head count.
“I think so,” my brother replied, and Samir disappeared back into the kitchen.
I handed the napkins to Enzo, who continued putting them around the long table we’d set up at the Grill, and walked into the back, in the kitchen where Samir, Remi, the head chef, and Kinsley were cooking up a storm.
Only this time, it wasn’t for our customers. It was for us. For our family.
It was actually Samir’s idea. And Enzo’s. To close the Grill on a Monday evening and have a proper family meal since the rest of November and December would be so hectic at the restaurant and all our other businesses.
Which was how we’d ended up at the Grill a week and a half before Thanksgiving, about to have a wholesome meal; a marriage of American, Somali, and Filipino cuisine—thanks to Remi—and have a blast with our extended family before the chaos of Christmas hit this town once more.
