“It should have been me,” he snarls, slapping his chest.
I’m under no illusion he cares for me. I now realize I’m a hole to fuck. A means of pleasure. I need to survive until he grows tired of me, or until I can escape his clutches. Only, I’m not sure I want to.
I yank at my restraints. All I want to do is be free from this prison and force his anger to melt away. If only I could touch him. I could show him he’s not the monster he thinks he is. “Who?” I press.
He strokes my hair reverently, sending a wave of confusion and desire through me.
His moods give me whiplash. “You’ll find out soon enough,” he says slowly.
“This is what’s gonna happen.” He forces my eyes on him with a grip on my jaw. “If I let you go, you need to trust me,” he says with an intense seriousness. His hand moves up to trace over my swollen lips.
I scoff, my voice is desperate. Trust is earned. Zain expects absolute submission. “Are you kidding me, Zain?” My brows furrow.
His face tells me he’s deadly serious. I’m not exactly in the ideal predicament to be smart-mouthed, but I can’t help myself. He’s playing unfairly, expecting me to follow dutifully along.
“You can’t be serious. You need to give me answers first! You’ve followed me for
years. You’ve stalked me, Zain. You expect me to blindly follow you…” I trail off, searching his eyes for a hint or kindness or understanding. He offers none. My chest tightens. One minute he looks at me with disdain, the next he offers me a glimpse into his soul before bricking me off again. What he does next takes me by surprise. He climbs into the bed and tugs me against his chest. His body spoons against mine. At least, to the best of his ability with my restraints.
“Follow me into the darkness, Vesper.” His tongue lashes out and licks along the shell of my ear. My name on his tongue sends a jolt through my insides and a shiver up my spine. He knows the effect he has on me. He doesn’t play fair. The reality sets in. He has a hold on me and willneverlet me go.
I open my mouth to speak, but words elude me. Inner turmoil eats away at my insides, tearing me apart like sinew.
“If I trust you but…I need answers at some point. Can you offer that?” I ask softly, hoping he can give me some sort of explanation.
He props himself up and stares at me for a moment as if contemplating my request, his dark hair resting over his eyes. “No,” he says coldly, without remorse or a second thought, and my heart sinks. He places another brick in his wall, closing me off.
I take a deep, shaky breath. “Zain, you killed a guy,” my voice squeaks. “You stole my virginity, and you drugged me…”
I hope he can see the insanity of it all. Something tells me he already knows though.
I realize saying it out loud how unhinged this sounds, and stupidly, I keep coming back. How messed up am I?
I grapple with his offer. He must sense my apprehension because he loses patience and snaps at me.
“Can’t promise I’ll give you answers. You’re atmymercy, Vesper. You have no choice.
Sure, you can go to the dean, but see what good that’ll do. I have more hold on this school than your own daddy. Kieran is onmyside. My father is high up on the social ladder.” His threat rings true.
He’s right. If my father gets even a little whiff of me being implicated in anything he will pull me out. I suck my lip, hating the fact I still want to actually believe him and cooperate. Nothing about this is normal. I’m pretty sure I’m suffering from some undiagnosed disorder to even consider he’s capable of anything other than destruction.
A stray tear falls down the side of my face. His gaze follows it until it lands on his dark comforter.
“You’re gonna have to be satisfied with the information I’ve given you.” He wipes another falling tear with his thumb before sucking it clean.
“If I agree, can I go?” I confirm, tugging at my restraints again.
He nods. “Gonna keep tabs on you, but yes. Don’t think about removing the cameras either, songbird.”
I nod in agreement and blow out a hot breath. “Okay…I trust you…”
“One week!” Clara chirps excitedly beside me. I’m way too edgy to focus on the professor’s lecture or on Clara. Zain’s eyes are burning a hole in my back as I tap my nails against my laptop keys.
“Earth to Vesperrrr.”
I purse my lips and look in her direction. “Sorry, just a lot on my mind with the symphony coming up,” I mutter. One week indeed. It’s coming up quickly, and I’m nowhere near as prepared as I’d like to be. It’s not a total lie. I haven’t been spending nearly enough time at the Cadence Building as I should be. My mind has been solely focused on Zain and everything that has transpired.
It doesn’t help that the entire student body is in shock over Jax’s “disappearance.” Add in trying to figure out what Zain meant when he saidthey chose me,and my brain is reeling.I’ve kept my mouth shut. I know how messed up murder is, but it almost seems justified.Almost.
