Avoid him.
But instead, I find myself getting up, getting ready, brushing my teeth. My heart hammers the whole way down the stairs.
When I reach the bottom, the first thing I do is look around for him.
Then I curse myself for doing it.
But the worst part is? I don't see him. He's not here.
It should be a relief.
It isn't.
Leon's sprawled on the couch, controller in hand, feet on the coffee table. If mum was alive she'd yell at him for it. Justin's sitting on the floor, back against the couch, laughing at something on the screen. Mason's perched on the armrest. Two other guys are in chairs that don't belong in this room - pulled from the dining table, dragged in, placed wherever there was space.
No Asher.
Leon notices me first.
"Morning," he says, casual, like I'm not standing here, staring around my house for his best friends shadow.
Justin's head turns. His eyes find mine and hold for half a second longer than normal.
He knows.
Not everything. But enough.
I try to avoid his gaze.
"Hey," I manage, forcing my voice to be calm, steady.
Mason lifts his chin. "Hey, Ivy."
"Why are you all here?" I ask, mostly to Leon, but the question tastes like something else in my mouth. Almost like I want to ask where Asher is.
I don't.
My eyes move to the empty space between the couch and the doorway - the place where Asher usually stands when he's here, shoulders filling the frame, gaze flicking over the room like he's cataloguing everything.
He isn't here.
My chest drops anyway.
He's avoiding me.
The thought hits hard and stupid and immediate, even though I was the one who started this. Even though I'm the one who has been avoiding him for days. Even though I literally told him to leave me alone.
But it still hurts.
It feels like rejection. Like confirmation.
I swallow it down so hard my throat aches.
Leon shrugs. "Day off. Figured we'd hang. You hungry? I've ordered pizza."
Of course he did. It's not even ten.
Justin's eyes stay on me like he's watching for what's wrong. Has Asher told him we're done? No, he wouldn't do that.
