The three of us laugh, and Gary’s face grows red as his hair with anger.
“Oh, what’s wrong, Gary?” Jacob jokes. “Can’t handle being out-douched?”
Gary throws up his hands. “I can’t do this anymore.”
Dustin comes down from laughing. “Do what?”
“Live here!” He slams his meaty hands back onto his hips. “I’m moving out. I came out here to tell you that, and as of right now, I know for certain it was the best move I’ve ever made in my life.”
“So I’m assuming you haven’t had sex before, then?” Jacob asks.
“Screw you,” Gary says through clenched teeth before he starts stomping back down the hallway.
“Gary, wait!” Dustin says, but Gary doesn’t listen.His door slams a few seconds later. “Fuck,” he adds in a whisper.
“Is it such a bad thing?” Jacob asks. “Then we can have any party we want to at any time.”
“Yes, it’s a bad thing.” Dustin rakes a hand through his hair. “I count on his half of the rent.”
I twist my lips to the side. “So get another roommate.”
He drops his hand to his lap. “I’ll have to.” He glances at me speculatively. “What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Move in with me.”
I raise my eyebrows. “I already have an apartment.”
He shrugs. “Give it up. Move in with me.”
I take a good, long swig. My parents would hate it. “I don’t know…”
“Come on,” he begs. “That one girl you’re after lives in the building, right? You could be closer to her.”
“True,” I murmur. I’d be right across the hall from her. It’d be harder to keep my secret from Dustin, but it would be easierto see her whenever I want to. “I don’t know. I’ll have to think about it.”
“That’s all I ask.” He downs his beer and sets it on the coffee table. “So you’re really not going to tell me about her? I could totally be your wingman since she lives in the building.”
“No,” I say firmly.
“He’s just not ready yet,” Jacob interjects, going back to his phone. At least he’s not smirking knowingly.
“Wait, you know who she is?” Dustin asks.
Jacob only glances up for a second. “I may have an idea.”
“Then tell me.”
He tucks his chin and pinches his lips together. “That’s not my story to tell.”
“Since when do you not tell stories?” Dustin grumbles.
He only shrugs and goes back to his phone. “I can keep shit to myself.”
“Sure, sure,” Dustin gripes. He looks back at me. “You’re really not going to tell me?”
I shake my head.
