“Or won't,” he agreed.
Disappointment fisted in her belly at his rejection. But she heard the sadness in his voice and knew that even if he would not tell her its source, she could not just walk away.
“It doesn't matter. I know all I need to know. All that is important. I know the kind of man you are: strong, kind, and honorable to the core.”
A bark of pained laughter shot from him. “You don't know me at all. Would that I were half the man you think me.” He shook his head, no longer fighting it, as if her words had made it easier on him. “No. Marry your Campbell, Lizzie. He will give you the life you deserve. I have nothing to offer you. No position, no wealth, no fine castles.”
“None of those things matter.”
He looked at her as if she were a fool. “Only someone who has never known otherwise would think that.”
Her cheeks burned. “All I meant was that I have those things already. I do not need to marry Robert to get them.”
He stiffened, and she feared she'd pricked his pride again. No man wanted to have his wife provide for him. How could she explain that without him by her side nothing else mattered? He started to turn away from her, and her heart dropped.
I'm losing him.
She clasped his arm again. “Please.” His eyes met hers. She opened her mouth, but no sound would come out. She had to tell him how she felt, but the idea of leaving herself so exposed, so vulnerable, terrified her. A cold sweat dotted her skin. Fear churned in her stomach, and for a moment she thought she might be ill.
She was a coward. But if she didn't take a chance, she would never know, and that would be infinitely worse. “I can't marry Robert Campbell.”
“Why?”
She wanted to close her eyes and hide, but she forced herself to say, “I don't love him.” She heard his sharp intake of breath, and his gaze intensified. “I …” She took a deep breath and let it out in one fell swoop: “I love you.”
The silence that followed was as loud as thunder and as painful as a thousand bolts of lightning striking her heart. She stared at him, willing him to say something—anything. But he stood motionless, as if turned to stone, and didn't say a word. Not one word.
Her heart started to thump and her breath quickened as horror slowly drained over her—as thick and heavy as the mud that she'd slipped in that hideous day.
I was wrong.
She looked away, wishing she were anywhere but here. In this warm, dark room, inches away from the man she loved who didn't want her.
“Lizzie …”
She tried to breathe through the knife plunged deep in her chest. “You don't need to say anything. I”—she choked— “just … thought. It seemed”—tears burned in her throat— “I thought you wanted me.” God, it hurt. The pressure in her chest was unbearable. She couldn't breathe. Her voice came out in a ragged whisper. “Obviously I made a mistake.”
He swore and grabbed her arm, pulling her against him in one harsh movement. More furious than she'd ever seen him. “You didn't make a mistake. God, can't you feel how much I want you?”
Shocked by the violence of emotion she'd unknowingly unleashed, she nodded and was suddenly very conscious of the hard column of steel thrust against her stomach. Hedidwant her. And if the size of him was any indication, badly. But was it more than lust? She gazed up at him through blurry eyes. “Then why are you doing this?”
“For your own good. You'll be better off with Campbell.”
Her heart soared. He wasn't rejecting her, he was only trying to do what he thought was best for her.Honorableto the core.She lifted her hand and cupped his cheek, savoring the rasp of dark stubble on her palm. “Shouldn't I be the judge of that? Am I to have no voice in deciding my own future?”
“Elizabeth …” His voice sounded tortured.
“Do you still want to marry me?”
His smoldering green gaze burned deep into her soul. “More than anything in this world.”
In his eyes, she saw the truth.He cares for me.A wide smile broke through her shimmery tears. “Then it's decided.”
His gaze fell to her mouth, and she thought he was going to kiss her, but instead he dropped his hold and took a step back. “I can't do this,” he said quietly. “It's wrong.”
She saw the steely determination in his eyes and knew that his mind was made up. A low rumble started from somewhere deep inside her and built until her entire body seemed to shake with it.
Just when she'd given up hope, she'd found the man she'd always dreamed of, a man who wanted her for herself. She'd be damned(!) if she would let him walk away out of some overprotective male sense of honor.
