Magnus stilled. But she didn’t even glance in his direction. “No,” she said in a soft voice.
Sutherland immediately brightened and started to say something, but she stopped him.
“I intend to take you up on your threat in any event. I’m tired of your interference.” She glanced back and forth between the two of them. “You two can kill one another if you want. I’m done trying to stop you.”
“I’ll take you to your room, my lady,” MacGregor said.
Helen gave him a grateful look. “Thank you. There is something I should like to speak with you about.”
What did she mean by that? Magnus watched them go, wanting to go after her, but…
But what? She’d refused him.
He steeled himself for some kind of taunt from Sutherland, but the immediate concerns of the situation took over when MacAulay, Sir Neil, and some of the other high-ranking members of the king’s retinue burst into the chamber.
Magnus spent the next couple of hours again trying to make order out of chaos. The men were apprised of what had happened, the bodies removed, the shocked Earl of Sutherland questioned about Munro, and finally, the king put safely to bed. So much for his “peacetime” mission.
His duties done for the night, Magnus poured himself a tall flagon of whisky and sat down, for the first time in what seemed like days, on a bench near the fireplace in the Great Hall. The trestle tables had been removed, and some of the men—the higher-ranking members of the king’s party enjoyed the Great Hall, while the rest of the men slept in the barracks—were already abed.
But he was wound too tightly right now to think about sleep. He couldn’t believe it. He heard her words all over again.“I love you, Magnus, but I won’t marry you. Not like this.”He’d been too stung by the refusal to understand what she meant, but he did now. But how could he do what she wanted? God knows, he’d tried to put it behind him. But how could he forgive himself? Yet it was that or lose her.
Sutherland entered the hall. He scanned the large room, and seeing Magnus, headed toward him. Magnus’s fingers tightened around the cup.
“Not now, Sutherland,” he warned. “We’ll end this, but not right now.”
Ignoring him, Sutherland plopped down on the bench beside him.
Magnus stiffened.
“I thought you might want to apologize,” Sutherland said.
“What the hell for?”
“I don’t know, maybe accusing me of trying to blow up the king?”
Magnus’s mouth tightened. “It wasn’t without cause.”
Sutherland just stared at him, a contemplative look on his face. “You’re more like Munro than you want to admit.”
Magnus muttered an expletive and then told him what he could do with it.
“He was too stubborn and proud to see what was right in front of him.”
“Your sister refused me, or didn’t you hear that part?”
“I heard it. But if I cared for someone as much as you appear to care for my sister, I would do whatever the hell I needed to do to change her mind.”
“Coming from you, that’s ironic. From what I hear, you’ve never cared about a woman in your life.” Magnus looked at him suspiciously. “Why are you doing this? You’ve been doing everything you can to prevent this for years.”
“Aye, but the difference between you and me is that I can admit when I’ve made a mistake. I thought you were lying about Gordon.”
“I was.”
“But not for the reasons I thought. Helen told me—well, actually she told Will, as she’s not talking to me—what happened. I’m only going to say this once, so make sure you’re listening. You did what no one hopes they are ever called upon to do, but something that could happen to any one of us. It’s part of war—an ugly part, but a part nonetheless. I would have done the same thing in your place, as would Gordon.”
Magnus didn’t say anything. The burning in his chest had crawled up his throat.
“He wouldn’t have wanted you to carry this burden. Nor would he have demanded a lifetime of penance.”