“It didn’t.”
“But you are alive.”
“But over half my men aren’t.”
Just saying the words was like a stab in the gut—or maybe he should sayback. She’d completely blindsided him.
Her face crumpled. She looked horrified—or rather he should say she was doing a damned fine job ofactinghorrified. “Oh God, Scott, I’m so sorry. I never meant any of this to happen.”
“What—spying or getting caught?” She slunk down, avoiding his gaze, which was so unlike her it made him angrier. Where was the denial? The outrage? The lies? He reached out and grabbed her by the arm to force her to look at him. “What the fuck did you think would happen when you passed on information to Russia about secret operations—aboutmysecret operations?”
He’d never sworn at her—at any woman—before, and she seemed to realize it, flinching at the word. He might have felt bad if he hadn’t just had his nose almost flattened. The wounded doe-eyed crap was another act. She’d had training and knew how to defendherself. She was an operative—an operative, damn it.And the probably reopened wound on his shoulder proved it.
“It wasn’t like that,” she pleaded, tears filling her eyes. “Please, you have to understand. I didn’t have a choice. Not about any of it. And I didn’t know that what I was doing had anything to do with you or Team Nine.”
Scott pushed her away from him, so filled with hatred and disgust he didn’t want to look at her. He didn’t know what he’d expected. Some kind of excuse? Some kind of denial? Even if it was a lie shouldn’t she try to say something to give him a reason not to hate her? He sure as hell hadn’t expected this instant capitulation. This “I’m sorry,” “I didn’t know,” fall-on-his-mercy crap. He didn’t have any mercy. Not where she was concerned.
“Well, it did—it had everything to do with me. And you did have a choice, Natalya. You just chose fucking wrong. Now get your shit together. We’re getting out of here before your new boyfriend gets back.”
She had the gall to look affronted. “The sheriff? He’s not my new boyfriend. I barely know him. Where are you taking me?”
“Where do you think? I’m taking you in—back to DC. There are a lot of people who want to talk to you. You can tell them your sob story and make damned clear while you are at it that I didn’t tell you anything.”
She took a step back, clearly afraid. “You can’t do that. They’ll kill me if they find out that I’m alive.”
“Is that supposed to be a deterrent? It’s no more than you deserve and probably what will happen to you anyway when they convict you of treason. But if by ‘they’ you mean your comrade Mikhail, you don’t have to worry about him.” He paused and gave her a hard look. “He’s dead.”
• • •
Natalie reeled back at Scott’s pronouncement. She covered the gasp from her mouth with her hand. “Dead?” she repeated dumbly, too stunned to let herself dare to believe it and shout for joy.
But Scott—this Scott who hated her and looked at her as if he didn’t know her—mistook her reaction from one of relief to something else. But could she blame him? She’d made them strangers by lying to him from the start.
This whole thing had taken on the feeling of the surreal. How could she just be standing here with him and not in his arms? She’d mourned and missed him every day since learning that he’d been killed, and now that he was here all she wanted to do was plaster herself against that big, safe warrior’s body, let him hold her and make her feel better, and weep with happiness. But she couldn’t. Everything had changed because he knew the truth. There wouldn’t be any happy reunions for them. Hatred was her new normal.
She’d feared this moment in her worst dreams, but it was far worse than she could have imagined. It felt as if her heart had been ripped to shreds and stomped on, leaving her with a longing so strong it threatened to cut off her breath. She wanted what had been so desperately, it was hard to accept this new reality.
“Sorry to break the bad news,” Scott said—clearly not sorry. “But one of my teammates shot your comrade when the bastard tried to kill my sister.” His gaze sharpened as he appeared to have just thought of something. “Let me guess: there was more than just a love of treason and Russia between you and Mikhail.”
Natalie knew Scott had every right to his sarcasm and every right to be angry and hate her, but she wasn’t going to take that—not about Mick.
She looked him straight in the eye and spoke in a firm voice. “You are wrong. I barely remember Russia, and I’m glad he is dead. There was never anything between us. I despised Mick. He was the one who forced me into this.”
Literally.
But her words fell on deaf ears and an indifferent shrug of shoulders. “What makes you think I give a shit?” He picked up her purse, which she’d dropped in their scuffle, and tried to hand it to her. “You have three minutes to get you stuff together, and then we’re leaving.” He gave her a warning look. “Don’t try anything. I won’t go gentle on you next time.”
She flushed, both angry and embarrassed. She hated how easily he’d evaded her defensive maneuvers. But that was the problem. Her training was defensive—meant to give her time to get away. She didn’t have the kind of training that would enable her to go head-to-head with him.
There probably wasn’t any training she could do to do that.
She knew every inch of his body. He was ripped. A physical specimen whose muscles weren’t just for show, they were for a purpose. They’d been built to help make him one of the most elite warriors in the world. His strength and skill were on a different level—i.e., not her level. Not 99.9 percent of the population’s level, either, for that matter. Even a small glimpse of his skill had proved that what she’d heard and read about tier-one SEAL operators was true.
Although she probably shouldn’t be thinking about his body right now. Or have her head filled with visions of resting her cheek on that bare chest she was just imagining with his powerful arms wrapped around her after they’d... what? Made love? Had sex? Screwed like bunny rabbits?
What meant one thing then was now confused. Tainted. It had been real for her, but in a fantasy world that was now gone.
His body and what they’d once shared were off-limits. She needed to keep her head clear if she was going to get through to him. Somehow she had to convince him not to take her in. It wasn’t just about her; she had to protect her family and the child she was carrying. The only way to keep them safe was for her to stay dead.
