“It wasn’t too difficult. He wanted to help.”
“He said something strange before he left. He asked for my forgiveness.”
Kenneth watched her eyes widen with surprise, and then fill with tears, as he told her the part Sir Adam had played in what had happened the last time she’d tried to escape.
“I don’t believe it,” she said. “He betrayed me?”
“He didn’t think he was betraying you, he thought he was protecting you. The English were too close. He thought they’d catch up to you and you would be imprisoned. He made a deal with the English soldiers, giving them Lady Christina’s men in exchange for the promise that you would be kept safe. But when the MacRuairis defeated the soldiers, everything went wrong. He tried to prevent you and your sister from being trampled on the bridge by destroying it, but then your servant fell and your sister ended up where she shouldn’t have been. He blamed himself for what happened to her, even though he couldn’t have known she would turn back.”
Mary appeared stunned. “No wonder he became upset every time I asked him to help me find her.” Her brows drew together. “That sound at the bridge last night—the boom and crack of lightning—it was just like that night with my sister. What was it?”
“Black powder. My foster brother William Gordon, Sir Adam’s nephew, had knowledge of it as well. As do I, although not at the level of theirs. I was looking for the recipe in those journals when you found me in the baby’s room. I didn’t find anything, but I suspected after what you told me about that night that Sir Adam had similar knowledge. I knew that it would help our chances of getting away, and he agreed to give me what I needed to see you free.” He smiled. “I wish I’d been able to carry more of it; it would come in handy the next few months.”
Suddenly, Mary seemed to recall something. “If you’ll hand me my bag, I think you will find that won’t be necessary.”
Puzzled, he handed it to her. She pulled out a folded piece of parchment and gave it to him. He scanned the page, his eyes widening when he saw the recipe he’d been searching for. “He gave this to you?”
She nodded. “To give to you.”
He shook his head in amazement. Without realizing it, his wife had just handed him a place in the Guard.
Nay, he realized. He’d done that on his own—even without the powder. He’d brought Mary and Atholl back to Scotland. He’d uncovered key information about the castles for the upcoming war. Not to mention single-handedly defeating nearly a score of English soldiers. He’d proved himself more than equal to the task. He’d proved himself one of the best.
He’d achieved what he wanted—more than he wanted—so why wasn’t he happy?
Because looking at his wife, he knew that none of it mattered if he didn’t have her by his side. Kenneth had been fighting his whole life, but winning her was the only fight that counted.
He took her small hand in his, looking deep into her big, blue eyes. “Can you forgive me, Mary? I know I hurt you. I should have told you sooner, but I was scared to lose you. I love you. Just give me a chance to prove it.”
Mary had never seen him like this. The cocky, too-handsome-for-his-own-good knight looked worried and unsure of himself. Didn’t he know he’d proved himself many times over in the past few days? Not just during the long, horrible hours on the ship where he’d gotten her through some of the most difficult and terrifying hours of her life, but by giving himself up for her, seeing her and her son to safety, coming for her, protecting her.
She shook her head. “No.”
His face fell. “No, you won’t give me a chance?”
Her mouth curved at his crestfallen expression. “No, you don’t need to prove yourself to me. I believe you. I believeinyou. How can I not, after what we just went through? There is no other man I would have by my side.”
His entire body seemed to relax. “Do you mean that?”
She nodded. Mary knew she could face the challenges ahead of her on her own, but she didn’t want to do that. She wanted to face them with someone else. She wanted to share her life with him.
Her mouth twitched. “But I will hold you to your vow to discuss your plans with me. If you are involved in anything dangerous in the future, please let me know.”
She’d meant it as a jest, but his face shadowed. “Aye, well, about that.”
She sat up a little higher in the bed. “Don’t tell me there’s something else?”
He winced. “I took a vow of silence before I met you.”
She frowned, her nose wrinkling. “Does this have something to do with Bruce’s phantoms?”
He looked at her in surprise. “How did you guess?”
She stared at him. Could he really not know? “You mean besides the fact that they are supposed to have virtually inhuman strength and skill, and I’ve seen you fight? There’s also the fact that you are all uncommonly tall and built like siege engines. But most important, I saw you with them. Even in pain, I could see that you were one of them.”
He looked stunned. “You could?”
It was obvious, apparently except to him. She nodded. “I must admit I was surprised to see that you are so close to your brother-in-law, given your clan history.”
