“There was no way you could’ve known something bad was going to happen.” I pulled back just enough to look up at him. There was no missing the aguish in his eyes as I said, “Rusty said it was some kind of hit. He wouldn’t tell me any more than that.”
“And I can’t tell you much either.” He brushed a strand of hair from my face. “Just that it looks like Davis was looking for some easy money, and this time it cost him.”
“Oh, Luke. I don’t even know what to say.”
“There’s nothing to say.” He gave a small shrug. “Shit happens.”
“But it was your brother.”
“He stopped being my brother the second he put that mask on.”
The words settled between us, heavy and final, and I knew it was time to let it go. I searched his face, wishing I knew how to take even a piece of the weight he was carrying, but all I could do was hold him a little tighter. After a few moments, he reached down and took my hand, leading me into the bedroom.
He eased back the covers and waited for me to crawl inside. Once I was settled, he tucked me in and said, “I’m going to take a shower.”
I nodded, and he kissed me on the forehead. My heart felt heavy as I watched him step into the bathroom and turn on the shower. I considered joining him, but something told me he needed this time alone. So, I gave it to him.
I lay there listening, waiting for any sign of distress, but all I could hear was the water falling. Eventually, I dozed back off,and the next morning, I woke to an empty bed and a note on his pillow.
Hadto get to the clubhouse. Didn’t want to wake you.
I’ll call later. Coffee is made and breakfast is on the counter.
Luke
I’d hoped that I would get to talk to him before I headed to work but no such luck. I didn’t have much luck the next day or the next. It seemed he was always busy, and even when we were together, painting his living room or watching TV or even attending his brother’s funeral, he barely spoke to me.
I couldn’t really blame him.
The funeral was rough.
He had to stand there knowing he’d not only lost his brother, but he’d been a part of something that hurt the club and even killed one of their dancers. It only deepened the wound to know that his best friend was the one who’d fired the shot that ended his life. That was a lot to take in. He also had to face his father and tell him that he’d had a part to play in his son’s death.
His father didn’t blame him.
No one blamed him. Not even the brothers. But that didn’t lessen the guilt he carried like a second skin. I hoped he just needed a little time, but with each day that passed, I became more and more consumed with doubt.
We were at his place, touching up paint and finishing trim, and he’d barely said two words to me. I felt like he was pulling away from me, and I wasn’t even sure he really wanted me there.
Even though I was terrified of what his answer might be, I finally mustered the courage to ask, “Do you still like me?”
“What?”
“Do you still like me?” I repeated. “If you don’t, if your feelings have changed, you can tell me. It’ll hurt, but I’m a big girl. I can take it.”
“Yes, I still like you, Presley. That’s a bit of an understatement, but I do.” He dropped his paintbrush in the bucket and walked over to me. He placed his hands on my hips as he said, “I know I’ve been distant lately, but I’ve had a lot on my mind.”
“I know you do, and I’ve tried to be understanding. But it feels like you’re shutting me out.”
“I’m not shutting you out, Presley. At least, I’m not trying to, but I’m not so sure that you shouldn’t be trying to shut me out.”
“What are you talking about?”
“If you’d come to the Vault even a few minutes earlier, you would’ve walked into a war zone… You could’ve been killed.” He dropped his hands from my waist and lowered his head. “And I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you.”
“But I didn’t walk in when all that was going on, and I wasn’t hurt or killed. And even if I was, it wouldn’t have been your fault.” I placed my hand on his chest. “There’s no way you could’ve known any of that was going to happen. None of it is on you, Luke. You have to stop blaming yourself.”
“That’s not going to happen.” He turned and stepped away from me. “I should’ve handled Davis from the beginning. I should’ve made sure he wouldn’t come back here and pull his shit, but I let him off easy. I knew better.”
