Not even for a second.
That’s when I knew Jehovah placed her in my path for a reason. She wasn’t just my woman. She was my soulmate. I slept through the night with her in my arms. No nightmares. No waking up drenched in sweat. No silence hanging over my life like a cloud.
“Nigga,” Cream said, pulling me out my thoughts. “It doesn’t matter how I proposed. Everybody shit different.” He took a slow drag before passing the blunt back.
“But speak from the heart,” he added. “Tell her why you want forever with her. That’s what matter.”
I nodded slowly, the shit sounded easy but seemed hard to do right now. My nerves were fried. This felt bigger than any deal I’d ever closed, any move I’d ever made in the streets. I had been planning this for weeks… actually months. I was supposed to do it earlier, but everything got postponed when Layloni and Rellianah ran off to check on Shadonna.
Layloni’s heart was too big sometimes. Always hurting for people who didn’t even care enough to help themselves. I wanted to marry her before our baby entered this world.
Every time the moment came though… I froze.
“You made sure Rita got my baby sizes right?” I asked Hussle, needing anything to focus on besides my heartbeat pounding in my ears.
He nodded confidently.
I had asked his girl to pick out a gown for Layloni. This wasn’t just about revealing pink or blue smoke. This was about forever.
I glanced across the backyard of Layloni’s house and my chest tightened at the sight of her. She was laughing with my mom and Rellianah, hands flying as she talked, eyes shining. Seeing her happy did something to me. It made everything worth it.
“When the pastor getting here?” I asked, my voice tight.
Hussle groaned dramatically.
“Nigga, hit the weed and chill the hell out. You messing up my high,” he said, shoving the blunt toward me. “I gotta do this same shit next month.”
I took a long pull, trying to slow my racing thoughts.
My future stretched out in front of me, clearer than it had ever been. I had money. Businesses. Opportunities. I didn’t need the streets anymore. For the first time in my life, I didn’t want the streets involved in my life anymore. I wanted to be there when my child took their first steps, said his first words, along with his first day of school.
My father never got that chance.
He had everything a man could want, but it was never enough. The streets had a grip on him like a toxic lover he couldn’t walk away from. I refused to repeat that story.
Losing him taught me one thing for sure. Trust was rare in our world, but if you lived right… maybe you could trust a few people.
Layloni was one of those people I trusted with my life.
My stomach tightened as I stood up and dusted off my jeans. I had on white denim, a Gucci tee, with matching loafers, I looked clean and simple. My hands trembled slightly as I opened the small velvet box.
The diamond caught the sunlight, nearly blinding me. My heart slammed against my ribs.
“Damn,” I whispered to myself.
I snapped the box shut and started walking toward the woman who was about to become my wife. Hussle and Cream thumped their chests and nodded at me, pride written all over their faces. They knew what this meant.
Changing wasn’t easy for men like us. We built our reputations on never settling down. Never needing one woman.
When I stopped in front of Layloni, she looked up and smiled. Her skin glowed, soft and radiant from pregnancy. She wasn’t even trying to be sexy, but she still took my breath away. No makeup. No fake nothing. Just natural beauty. She wore a flowing white Gucci dress with matching sandals, gold bamboo hoops brushing her neck. Her hair was slicked into a high ponytail, baby hairs perfectly laid across her forehead.
She looked like peace. I stared a little too long. Cream nudged me hard in the back, snapping me out of it.
Before Layloni could ask what was wrong…
I dropped to one knee. Her gasp sliced through the air.
My mom clutched her chest, eyes wide. Rellianah stayed calm as always, just smiling softly.
