Just thinking about it had my nerves wired tight all morning. I had been hitting Layloni’s phone all day. It was the first thing I did when I woke up, sometime around noon, and again later in the afternoon. Every time I texted her, I tried to keep it simple so she wouldn’t feel like I was blowing her up. Her responses were short though, one word responses maybe even two. Either way it went, I didn’t like the dryness of her text responses, like she wasn’t feeling a nigga.
Every now and then she’d say something about the baby fluttering in her stomach, and every time she did my chest would tighten up in a way I couldn’t even explain. Like my heart was trying to wrap itself around something that wasn’t even here yet.
I asked her a few times if she wanted to grab dinner. Even offered to bring her something to eat. She declined and a polite way each time, ending that shit with a thank you. It was obvious that her stubborn ass was keeping me at arm’s length but still showing respect.
Besides all the bullshit and distance, she created, I couldn’t lie and act like I wasn’t excited about this doctor’s appointment today. I was also anxious to see her pretty ass too.
I had plans on surprising my mom later with news of becoming a grandmother. I also wanted to tell her that in two months she could have my house if she wanted it. I already had shit in motion to buy a bigger house. Something meant for a family. For me, Layloni… and our baby.
It had only been a couple days since I last saw her, but during that time my mind had been running nonstop. I didn’t battle hard with going to fuck other women. I was surprised that I hadn’t even entertained another woman. The only person that consumed my mind was Layloni and the baby.
Everything about her had me caught up, the way she talked, the way she carried herself, it all came from a genuine place. She was a good woman. That I realized I was scared to lose. I kept asking myself how long would Layloni wait for me to get my shit together… Shit had me paranoid that she wouldn’t wait at all. I pictured that bitch ass nigga Monty trying to get in where he fit in. There was no way I was about to allow that nigga to play step dad to any seed of mine.
I thought about my father and wished I could rap with him one more time. He taught me all the good shit about being a good man. I thought about the way he treated my mom. There was never a time when I caught mom’s crying about him cheating or even entertaining another woman. Mom’s was too good of a woman for that kind of betrayal. I couldn’t even remember a time my dad looked twice at another woman when we were out in public.
Thinking about that made me realize something. Layloni would be worth that type of loyalty. She had beauty, brains, and cared about people. Most of the time she put others before herself. There really wasn’t a selfish bone in her body to keepit real. The more I thought about it, the more I realized my attraction to her had never really been just about sex.
It was deeper than that. It’s why I already put shit in motion to do right by her and step to her like a real man should without baggage, drama, or bullshit.
When I pulled up to the doctor’s office, I sat in the car for a second and took a deep breath. My nerves were jumping. I popped a piece of gum in my mouth and stepped out.
Her car was already parked outside. Layloni was punctual as hell. I walked inside and scanned the waiting room until my eyes landed on her. She was sitting there texting, smiling down at her phone.
My eyebrows pulled together immediately. It had to be that nigga Monty. That was the first name that popped in my head. That shit rubbed me the wrong way instantly. I told myself I’d deal with him later though. Right now, this moment was about my child, not jealousy.
Layloni looked up and spotted me. Her face lit up with surprise.
“You came!” She squealed out in excitement.
She stood and walked quickly to stand on her tip toes and hug me. I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her close, squeezing her soft body against mine. She smelled good as hell like something light and sweet.
She was wearing a yellow summer dress that stopped mid-thigh, and the material hugged her curves perfectly. When my hand slid lower, she pulled away quickly and shot me a warning look.
“Of course I came,” I said. “That’s my baby too.”
She blushed, grabbed my hand and guided me towards the sitting area. I casually draped my arm around her shoulders, when my hand wandered again she slapped it away.
“King,” she said firmly. “Don’t start that. We already talked about this.”
I chuckled since she was still trying to push that friendship boundary.When in my mind she was already mines. A nigga already had shit in motion for her to go along with and accept. Before I could respond, the nurse called her name and we headed back.
When that ultrasound machine flickered to life and I heard my baby’s heartbeat for the first time… My chest got tight, that shit was a slap of reality. I sat staring at the screen, feeling something shift deep inside me. Pride swelled up in my chest in a way I had never felt before.
Right then nothing else mattered, not the streets, money nor hoes. Just Layloni and the tiny heartbeat that sounded off from her stomach. While the doctor talked to her, I pulled my phone out and started Googling romantic ideas. I felt stupid doing it, but I wanted to do something nice for her tonight.
Layloni got up to use the restroom, leaving her phone on the counter. It buzzed almost immediately. I stared at it for a second before grabbing it. Just this one time is what I told myself before glancing down at it. Going through a woman’s phone was some hoe shit. I never in a million years thought I’d get this desperate.
Just as I started to talk myself out of going through her shit, a text message from Monty popped up. He was asking her how her appointment went then asked if I showed up. My jaw tightened. I resisted the urge to reply like some jealous female. Instead I opened the contact and quickly snapped a picture of his number.
When her phone buzzed again, another message popped up.He asked if he could bring her dinner tonight. That was the moment my blood started boiling. I had been asking her for days to bring food just so I could spend time with her. Now this nigga was asking and I already assumed that when Layloni saw his messages the answer would be yes.
Nah, this shit was ending today.
I texted his number to Rellianah with a payment and told her I needed a location within two hours. Her response came back quick. With laughing emojis, and a text that read…Stalking ass nigga.
After I made sure Layloni got home safe and had food, I sat in my car for a minute with the engine running, staring out at nothing. My mind was moving fast, too fast.
Jealousy wasn’t something I was used to feeling. It was the way Layloni smiled down at that phone that remained stuck in the forefront of my mind.
