His hand rubbed slowly up and down my back.
“I been wrong for that. I’ll work on it. We learning this parenting thing together, baby.” He placed a gentle peck against my temple.
That was one thing about Cream that I loved the most. When he knew he was wrong… he owned it. He was big on accountability.
Being a parent gave me crazy anxiety sometimes. I always wondered if I was doing a good job. I knew I wasn’t perfect, but I gave it the best that I had. A few minutes later the kids came running down the stairs sounding like a herd of elephants.
Christian ran straight to me and wrapped his arms around my waist before reaching up with his short arms. He was a mommas boy for real. After a few minutes they all headed out to the store with Cream, leaving me alone in the quiet house.
Chapter Thirty
Layloni
“These L.A. niggas where it’s at, I’m telling you, Lay Lay! I been makingbig bankout here!” Shadonna’s voice boomed through my office loudly.
I rolled my eyes quietly while finishing up the check I was writing her for the month. The pen scratched against the paper while she kept running her mouth, clearly proud of herself. I couldn’t even lie, her work around here had been solid.
Every time she showed up to the shop she came ready to work. She washed hair, laid beehives down neat, stayed professional, and the girls out on the floor actually liked her.
So, I had no real complaints. Apart of me secretly prayed she would stop stripping although it wasn’t my business. As long as she was taking care of those kids and staying focused, I stayed out of it. Lately she had been spending more time with them, going to counseling, and trying to get her life back on track.
Taking her medication for her bi-polar disorder was still a struggle for her though. I made it clear that she had to be on medication if she wanted to continue working in my shop. I wasn’t about to have her snapping on customers or flipping out on my staff.
Despite everything that happened between us… I still had love for Shadonna. I just kept my distance. My trust that I once had for her was gone, and I knew it would never come back the way it used to be.
I believed in forgiveness, not just for her but also for myself. You had to let some things go if you wanted your own blessings.
So that’s what I did, I forgiven her but I didn’t forget.
“I’m telling you, Lay,” Shadonna kept going excitedly, “once I clear this acne up and get my boobs done, I’m finna be thetop bitch in L.A.! We should’ve moved out here years ago!”
I ripped the check from the book and slid it across the desk. Her eyes lit up when she grabbed it.
Meanwhile my mood was shitty as hell.
Ever since the situation with King, something inside me had been off. A part of me knew I probably should’ve heard him out that night… but my emotions were all over the place. When I exploded, I exploded. There was no stopping it.
“You need to focus on your kids,” I said calmly, leaning back in my chair. “And ain’t nothing wrong with your body. You are beautiful, Shadonna.”
Her head snapped up quick.
“Why you always bringing up my damn kids like I’m some horrible mother?” Her tone came out sharp, and I slowly lifted my eyes to meet hers.
Today really wasn’t the day for attitude.
“Youwasa bad mother once,” I said bluntly. “That’s why I keep reminding you to put them first, bitch.” The word slipped out before I could stop it.
For a second, we both froze.
I hardly ever called my friends that, even though they threw the word around like it was nothing. It just wasn’t my style. Lately, my hormones had my patience running thin and my attitude worsened.
That’s why I stayed locked in my office most days instead of out on the floor with my employees. I didn’t want my bad energy rubbing off on them when I was the same person always preaching about positivity.
Shadonna stared at me like I had just slapped her.
“Girl… fuck you,” she said slowly, anger rising in her voice. “You ain’t gotta remind me of shit. And if you don’t wanna be my friend, just say that.” Her face was turning red now.
“You ain’t my friend, Shadonna,” I replied coldly.
