Jasper was rolling and groaning softly. He was still curled, fetal-like, on the ground. Landry’s brothers were hulking over him as if looking for a reason to kick him some more. Valerius almost felt bad for Jasper. Almost. But not really.
“Did you really mean what you said about Jahara?” Kaila asked. She looked up very earnestly at Landry. “I mean I guess anyone would feel that way about Jahara and Esme and Valerius and Caden, but I do not know about the rest of us. I do not feel royal at all.”
“You never did, love.” Tez took her right hand and kissed it. “That’s never been your bag. Yours is one to love life and remind us all of the present. To live in the moment.”
“I could not live in this moment,” Illarion growled. “Let this moment pass so I have my Mephous again.”
Mei was pacing. Her earlier outburst was still fueling her. But Valerius knew what had fueled that: fear. Fear that she would lose Xipil. Fear that she would be helpless for the rest of her very short life. Whether they survived this night or not, if their Dragon Spirits did not return to them…
“Could the Spirits choose others?” Mei asked. “No, no, that’s madness.”
“Worried that Xipil knows you’re a bad match? That it should find someone else to bond with?” Illarion prodded.
She turned and raised a fist to him. “Your nose has stopped bleeding, Illarion. Let me help you with that.”
Illarion put up his hands as if to ward her off, then seeing the others watching this, he dropped his hands to his lap and stuck his chin out.
“You want to hit me to make yourself feel better, Mei? Do it. Maybe it will make us both feel better,” Illarion said almost calmly. “Then we don’t have to think if our Dragon Spirits will have found us wanting, even if they do survive the fight with the Behemoth.”
“You think that Mephous would leave you?” Esme lifted an eyebrow.
Illarion grimaced and then shrugged. “Mephous needs to be with the strongest. That piece of garbage is not wrong that we are weakened.”
“We are just not used to being alone. If parts of your soul are missing how can you be complete? How can you not be weakened?” Kaila asked.
“Exactly!” Mei pointed at Kaila. “The Spirits are a part of us!” She thumped her chest with her other hand. “They cannot leave us! They cannot choose another!”
“Has anyone ever seen a Shifter die and have that Spirit come back in another?” Tez asked, casting wide-eyed glances around the room.
There was silence at first with all of the Dragon Shifters’ foreheads furrowing or frowns creasing their faces, except for Anwar. Just as he had been the one to see the Behemoth first, and see clearly the danger, he seemed to understand this better too. He was standing by the closed doors to the courtyard. Moonlight streamed down on his face from the high windows. His arms were crossed over his bare chest.
“Once. Long ago,” Anwar said. “A Spotted Leopard Shifter. The first time I saw the Spirit was in battle. One of the many waged in the desert. She was caught in the jaws of a Werewolf Shifter that severed her head clean from her body. The Spirit’s eyes glazed over and she was gone. A woman, the human form, headless remained behind. Then a hundred years later I saw that same Spirit. It now inhabited the form of a young man.”
“You can’t be sure!” Esme countered. “Did you speak to it?”
Anwar shook his head.
“Then you don’t know.” Esme shook her head.
“I know,” Anwar said. “It happens.”
“But only at the death of the human form,” Kaila pointed out. “Right?”
“And how do we know that the spirit of the human wasn’t reincarnated into the body of the young man and the Spirit joined them again?” Jahara was gentle.
Anwar let out a breath. “Perhaps. That could be.”
“We’re not dead,” Illarion muttered.
“Not yet. And hopefully, not ever,” Esme answered.
“You have no doubt that Raziel will come back to you, do you, Valerius?” Tez asked.
Valerius had been listening quietly to all of them, but he found he didn’t share their fears or their dread. But he hadn’t realized why until he was asked that question by Tez. “No, but not for the reasons you think.”
“What do you mean?” Esme asked, her brow furrowing, but looking intrigued.
“They didn’t bond with us because we are the strongest or the best. Well, that may be true of Caden.” Valerius smiled softly as he stroked Caden’s forehead. It was cool and still. But not for long. He met their gazes. “Chione told Caden that we met our Spirits through noble, brave acts like his, but we all know that isn’t true.”
