I hang up before he can respond and head straight to Mama’s house. This can’t be true. It just can’t.
Jennings walks out to his bike as I pull into Mama’s driveway. “Zep, hey. I was hoping to see you before I took off.”
“You’re gonna need to stay. Unless you already know,” I say, barely kicking my stand out in time as I climb off my bike.
“Know what?”
“About my father.”
He frowns. “Butch? Yeah, I know that motherfucker had a one-night—”
“No, the fuck he didn’t.”
“What?”
I don’t answer him, and he follows me inside. Mama walks out of the kitchen and smiles at me. “Zep, baby, are you here to say goodbye to your uncle?”
“Is it true?”
“Is what true?”
Jennings puts a hand on my shoulder, but I brush it off. “Zep, calm down.”
“What’s wrong, Zeppelin?”
“Have you been lying to me my entire life?” I ask. “Have you been lying to fucking everyone?”
“Watch your tone,” Mamascolds. “You don’t come into my house and talk to me like that. You were raised to have respect. Not just by me, but by Johnny. And don’t you dare disrespect him like that.”
She’s right. But I have to know. “Is it true, Mama?”
“Is what true?” Jennings asks.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Zep.”
Swallowing, I force the vomit back down. “You never had a one-night stand with Butch, did you?”
She pales. “Where would you—”
“Wait, Butch isn’t his father? What the fuck are we upset about? That’s great news,” Jennings says with a chuckle.
The look on Mama’s face tells me everything. It’s true. It’s not just gossip. “No, he is.”
“I don’t understand.”
Mama’s lip trembles. “Zep—”
“Why would you lie for him?” I shout. “Why tell us all a story rather than the truth?”
“Because he was going to kill us if I didn’t,” she says, tears streaming down her face. “He wouldn’t have thought twice about killing you. Before or after you were born.”
My legs give out, and I barely make it to the couch rather than the floor. I can’t breathe. My entire body goes numb, and I think I might be having a stroke.
“What the fuck is going on?” Jennings asks.
I know he knows. There’s enough context to put the pieces together, but he doesn’t want to believe it. Hell, I don’t want to believe it, either.
“Jennings, go home,” Mama says.
