He winks, and I melt. We’re really doing this. It’s real. It’s happening.
“Mommy?” Bernie whispers, walking over to the chair I’ve at least managed to sit in gracefully.
“Yeah, baby?”
“I’m happy about this.”
And there goes that panic rising again. “You are?”
“He makes you happy. You like to fight with him. And he has kitties. Plus, he’s my best friend.”
So much at stake. Damn it.
“I’m glad you’re happy, baby.”
“Are you happy?”
I was. “I am.”
All worry disappears when Zep walks over wearing my apron over his leather kutte and oven mitts on his hands. He really knows how to lighten a mood.
Maybe this isn’t going to be a disaster. Maybe, just maybe, this can work.
Bernie’s already in bed when I join Zep on the couch. He holds out his arm, and I snuggle into his side. This feels so… normal.
“What’s going on in there?” Zep asks, tapping his finger gently on the top of my head.
“It’s just… very real now.”
“Still scared?”
Swallowing, I tilt my head up to look into his eyes. “Terrified.”
“Misty—”
“Bernie says you’re her best friend, Zep. Promise me that even if things don’t work out between us that you’ll still be there for her.”
He pulls me onto his lap and cups my face. “I don’t plan on leaving either of you.”
“You say that now, but—”
“Baby, I need you to lower that fence you have around your heart just a little bit more. There’s nowhere I’d rather be and no other family I’d rather be a part of.”
I want to believe him. I do. And part of me does. But then I remember Chanel standing out in his yard wrapped in his bedsheet not that long ago. The woman Zep took a beating for.
“I don’t want her,” he whispers, his eyes locked on mine. “Nothing she has to offer holds a candle to what I get with you and Bernie.”
“Which is? Because I have to be honest, Zep, no man has ever wanted to stay before. Not for the long term.”
His tongue slides over his lower lip. “First, this family comes with a woman who gives surprise blowjobs in the bathroom at a bar to distract me. And who I can’t stop thinking about moaning my name when she finally stops being bossy and lets me take charge.”
“Is that right?” I ask, my breathing becoming shallow as I think about how much I enjoy those things, too.
“And she comes with a daughter I’d jump in front of a train for before ever letting her get hurt.”
I can’t take it any longer. I need to taste him. My lips crash onto his, and he holds me tightly as he deepens the kiss. I’m so head over heels for this man that I’m willing to do almost anything. Like lowering my guard enough to fully let him into my heart.
“Do you want me to go?” he whispers.
