“About us?”
“Yes.”
He shifts to look down at me. “I know you have reservations, but I hate to break it to you, babe… you kind of make a statement around town by coming to the Seven Crows with me.”
It’s true. And I knew what it meant before I agreed. Part of me wants to be Zep’s girl. “I know.”
“We’ll do this your way. Whatever you want to do, I’ll do. But I’m here, Misty. If you want to do this and see where it goes, I’m all in.”
The words make me happy, but the voice in the back of my mind tells me I can’t fully trust them. Just weeks ago, Zep mourned losing the love of his life. The one he allowed to use him over and over again. Only a man in love would take on that amount of torture.
“I think when Bernie gets home tomorrow that we should take some space. Play it by ear.”
Licking his lips, Zep nods, and I see that same insecurity in his eyes that I did the first time we spent together. “Okay.”
“I’m sure that’s not what you want to hear, but…”
“You’re not ready to start something that could hurt Bernie.”
I could lie as I gaze into his brown eyes. It would be so easy, but I know he’s been lied to enough. And he’s more than honest with me. “It’s not just Bernie’s heart getting broken that I’m worried about.”
Frowning, he leans back. “You’re worried I’ll hurt you?”
“We’ve had an incredible week,” I say with a small smile. “Amazing, actually. Hell, I might even go as far as mind-blowing to describe our time together.”
This earns me a small smile, but it’s quickly replaced by the frown. “But?”
“But you just ended a… Relationship doesn’t seem appropriate, but I don’t know what to call what you were doing with Chanel. I know she hurt you, and I…” I take a deep breath, hoping he doesn’t take too much offense to this. “I don’t know if I can really trust you’re over her.”
“You think I’m lying?”
There’s a pain there that almost brings me to tears. A pain that makes me want to kiss him and never stop.
“I don’t. I think you believe you’re over her, but I’m… scared. I’m scared you’ll realize too late that it’s not that easy. That you’re still in love with her when she comes back. And we both know she will come back.”
“Misty—”
“When she comes back, I’m kind of terrified that you’ll choose her over Bernie and me.”
It’s as honest as I’ve ever been with anyone since Ben. My heart races, and I feel lightheaded as I wait for an answer, our eye contact never breaking.
“I wouldn’t do that to you.”
“We don’t have the history you have with her. And I come as a package deal. I don’t really understand how Chanel is still engaged, but if she decided to dump her fiancé, I think you might struggle with the decision about who to be with. And I’m not positive you’d choose us.”
He reaches up and runs his hand along my cheek before cupping it and rubbing my temple with his thumb. “I’d choose you and Bernie.”
“It’s easy to say that right now. Before it’s happened. But history repeats itself until someone stops it. And when it’s been repeated as much as yours has, it’s not as simple as it sounds. Especially because she’s where you’re comfortable, Zep.”
“It is easy, Misty. So fuckingsimple.”
I smile and sigh, kissing his lips gently. “It sounds like it, but I’ve been there. Walking away from your first love is never as easy when the time comes.”
“I don’t like that you don’t have faith that I mean what I say.”
Running my hand along his soft beard, I do my best to stop my lip from trembling. “I do, Zep. Believe me, I do, but I’ve been in your shoes. And I know you mean it right now. But in a few weeks, when she comes crawling back, you might not mean it anymore. By then, it’ll be too late.”
“Too late for what?”
