He clutches her forearm as her legs dangle over the side. Sigvid manages to catch hold of a thin tree trunk before he almost joins her on the precipice.
“Avina, listen to me! Do not look down! I will pull you up!”
She nods, her eyes wide in terror.
He grunts as he anchors his legs against the tree and tugs her into his grasp. At last, her body curls over the cliff face, landing safely beside him, shaken but alive.
I almost lost her. For a second godsdamn time!
He is speechless while they catch their breath, and the remaining debris tumbles down the path. He hugs Avina tightly to his chest, savoring the beating of her heart.
“Do not ever fall off a cliff again. Do you hear me?”
“Sigvid-” Her voice is strangled from his hold.
He releases Avina and searches her eyes. “I am…”
Is this relief? Or just a miserable squeeze of his heart to the point of bursting?
“All that matters is that you did not fall into the canyon.”
Sigvid grumps and is about to turn away from her when he notices her bottom lip quivering.
“Avina, if I would have known what that bastard was going to do to you… I would never have left you in that study.”
Fuck, I would have brought her straight to Blackwood. I wonder if I can dig up Rendel and stab him twenty more times.
“When my guards brought you into Scarwood,” she interrupts his rationalization of re-murdering a corpse, “I knew the only way you would give me the information was through torture.” She licks her lips before continuing, “I insisted on being in the room so you were not alone with Lenzo, the torturer. As Queen, I brought you in, and you deserved my presence. Even if it was difficult.”
“You are right. That was the only way you would get information from me.” He chuckles.
And here, he had believed she was there to gloat. Those nights of fantasizing about squeezing the breath out of her lungs were unfounded.
Dammit, why the fuck does he feel so wrong? Whatcanhe blame this woman for?
“I healed you the first night because I feared Lenzo would be rougher with you after the fire extract.”
Fuck, why is she telling him this? He can accuse her of very little from the war onward. Every action this woman has taken has been justifiable.
Am I the asshole?
“Why tell me this? Why now?” he demands.
“Because-” She throws up her hands in defeat. “Because I am sorry, Sigvid! I know you hate me for the wretched Azure Blooms trick after that battle. For having you tortured. And, of course, the Arena.”
Why does he wish to comfort her? After everything, he imagined this apology going quite differently. His favorite had her bound naked before his Drengr as he hacked her to pieces. But, now fuck it all to the Abyss. He somehow feels unfit to receive her words.
“I am such a stupid fucking girl.” Tears fill her eyes.
He is under the impression that there is more she intended to say. Much of what she says holds a deeper meaning he knows he will need to unpack later.
“You have many reasons to keep me as your prisoner, to torture me for the next two months. And they’re all my fault. Everything I subjected you to is not your fault.” She hugs her chest and whispers under her breath.
Sigvid catches a blip of her mutterings: “Goddess, will I ever be worth more than a source for his revenge?”
Until then, Sigvid has cherished her as his prize for conquering the Arena, seeking vengeance on her for putting him there in the first place and in the war.
“By now, you should know I will do anything to keep you safe and at my side. Let us move on. Fjell Mountain will not climb itself.” Sigvid urges her onward.
