“I’ve had enough tea, darling.”
I let that blasphemous statement pass without comment. His smirk told me he was trying to bait me into replying.
“Then let’s go up to bed.” The short trip upstairs was made in complete silence. The quiet continued through our bedtime rituals and me lending Justin a night shirt in a material I imagine was far rougher than anything that had ever touched his skin. I made no excuses for the poor quality or the tight fit; instead, I slid between the sheets and squeezed my eyes shut until he settled beside me.
It was a long time before I fell asleep. I didn’t want to miss a minute of having my beloved by my side for the last time. My heart couldn’t take much more.
I woketo the smell of sage and lemon and my nose pressed against Justin’s neck. Sometime in the night, I had rolled over and clambered over him until we were as close as two people could be without becoming a single entity.
My foggy brain could barely decipher the situation before I was rolled onto my back only to have Justin leaning over me a second later.
“You smell different,” I blurted out. This early in the day, I had even less of a filter between brain and mouth.
“New soap. Do you like?”
I nodded. “It’s good.”
He scooted closer, sniffed along my neck, and left behind a trail of kisses that curled my toes. “You smell the same.” He grinned.
“I’m going to guess that’s a good thing?”
“No one else smells of metal and oil and makes me think of home.”
“You like the smell of oil?” I didn’t bother to hide my disbelief.
“I like the smell of it on you. For me, it’s a source of comfort and love. I’ve never been more at home than when you are in my arms.”
“How did I not know that you were a closet sap?” I lifted an eyebrow and tried to suppress a blush. Shards of pain awaited me if I fell back into his sweet-spoken trap.
Instead of an answer, Justin kissed me. Lava flowed down my spine and liquidated my bones. His lips became the only point grounding me to reality as my spirit tried to fly.
When breathing became necessary, he lifted his mouth and allowed me a quick sip of air before returning his claim upon my lips. I lost track of time as we tangled tongues and shucked clothing. In the back of my mind, my anger still simmered, but my soul cried out for my other half and refused to turn him away. Torn between sense and sensation, I chose the latter.
“If you don’t want this, tell me to stop. I won’t have you upset with me later.” Justin’s words came out in passion-slurred syllables barely discernible from one word to the next. I smiled at his mussed hair and barely focused eyes.
“You are so gorgeous,” I blurted out.
He blinked at me. “That isn’t a yes.”
I took the moment as my passion cooled to really think about our relationship. I could break things off and go back to my solitary existence with only the occasional contact with friends, or I could take the love of a man who had made some mistakes but gave me his heart.
“Don’t stop.” What else could I choose?
His eyes widened until he appeared more like a youth and less like the powerful lord I knew him to be. “Where is your oil?”
I waved my hand to the table beside the bed. “Where I always keep it.” Being alone meant I was quite capable with my right hand and a bit of oil.
Justin’s mouth curved into a wicked grin. “Good spot.” He applied the oil to his fingers and cock with necessary generosity. I relaxed beneath his ministrations. His familiar touch eased me even as my body tingled with anticipation and my gut twisted with need.
“Easy love,” Justin soothed, as if I were a fractious horse.
His slender fingers, which I so admired, pressed against my entry before sliding inside and blinding me with sensation. Discomfort moved to desire, then slid into a free fall of greedy, hungry need.
“Fuck me!” I growled. My voice dipped into regions I hadn’t known I could reach.
“Soon. I have to make sure you’re ready.” He slid a soothing hand down my right thigh.
“Now!” I didn’t want to be calmed. I had darker, hungrier desires that scoffed at gentle lovemaking.
