It’s getting worse.
There is absolutely no doubt now that the sickness is growing. More wolves from both packs are experiencing sudden illness or disruptions to their powers. I can’t ignore it, but I also don’t want to face it.
Because then I’ll have to admit the marriage ritual didn’t work.
I can see it all too clearly—Darla announcing she was right all along, Thorne backing her up, all of them turning on Sadie and coming up with suggestions for how we’ll get rid of her.
None of which would be pleasant, but ultimately, I know they’ll argue for her execution.
I can’t even guarantee that Cassie would be safe. When she first arrived, the others agreed she was a full-blood shifter, but she doesn’t seem to share any attributes with the other shifter kids. Even though she seems full of power, she smells less like a wolf every day, and that will only make the council fear her—and that is more dangerous than anything else.
Sighing, I head downstairs, hoping that I can hide my feelings from the girls. I can’t ignore what’s going on in the pack, but I don’t feel good about telling Sadie, either. When I get to the kitchen and see her drawn, tired face, it confirms what I’ve already been feeling the last few days.
She’s not well, either.
“Morning,” she says, gesturing to the table. “There’s a cup of coffee there for you.”
“Thank you,” I reply, sitting down across from Cassie. “Good morning, sweetheart. How did you sleep?”
“Great!” she says, beaming. “Mommy made waffles.”
“I see that,” I say, laughing.
Cassie grins as she shovels a big piece of waffle with ice cream and syrup into her mouth, and my heart aches with tenderness.
At least someone’s happy. I feel like if Cassie’s okay, I can survive anything. But this emotional tug of war inside me sure feels like a slow way to die.
Sadie sits down next to me, smiling as she puts down a plate of waffles for me. I eat slowly, watching her, and she only takes a few bites before pushing the food around on her plate.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
She nods, smiling quickly. “I’m fine. Just not as hungry as I thought I was. Should we get going soon?”
“Sure,” I reply, knowing that she’s more worried about distracting me than getting to work on time. Jean comes to pick up Cassie, and Sadie and I head off, the silence in the car between us feeling like a glass screen that could shatter and cut us both to shreds if we say the wrong thing.
She looks so tired and restless that I can’t bring myself to say anything to her, but throughout the day, more messages come through from the council and my friends. I realize I can’t stall on this any longer and decide to organize a family day tomorrow so I can take us away from everyone else and hopefully get Sadie to open up.
We might even talk about Cassie finding out I’m her father. She already sees me as her dad, and we need to decide if we’re going to take this next step or not. Is Sadie still planning to leave?
I text Sadie my idea for the family day, possibilities swirling in my mind as I try to distract myself by getting under the hood of a car for a few hours.
Cars are simple. You put the pieces together right, and it goes. Nothing like running a pack… or surviving a marriage.
When I check my phone, I’m surprised to see that Sadie has replied, but she wants us to go out alone and leave Cassie with Jean.
My first instinct is to protest and bring Cassie with us, but then the idea strikes me that Sadie might have something specific she needs to talk about that she doesn’t want to say in front of Cassie. Even though I feel relieved that I might finally have an opening for the difficult conversation, I’m also full of foreboding for what it could mean.
The ritual didn’t work. That’s clear now. The council wants her gone. Sadie doesn’t want to stay. This could all work out for the best.
The thought causes raging frustration to rise in my gut, and I throw myself back into work, trying to ignore it. In this scenario, everyone gets what they want—except me.
I can’t let them go! It’s so selfish of me to want them to stay, even though it doesn’t help the pack and it’s not what Sadie wants. I can’t help it, though. I want them in my life.
After work, I pick Sadie up, and we chat on the way home. She seems much more relaxed and asks about the plans for tomorrow. I explain the family activities I had in mind, but she surprises me again by telling me she wants it to be just the two of us.
Back home, we make dinner together, and when Cassie gets home, we eat at the table as a family. Again, my emotions twist inside me as I try to contemplate the rest of my life without them in it.
I can’t do this. I literally cannot imagine my future without them.
