Chapter 15
Noah
Ilean on the vanity, staring at my reflection as I give myself a pep talk.
“You want this. No one will ever find out. You can be who you really are for one night. There’s nothing wrong with you.”
My fingers itch to grab the plastic razor beside my hand to relieve some of the anxiety wreaking havoc with my nervous system, but I fight the urge.
I want this, and I want him.
His large hands exploring my body, his warm breath ghosting over my skin.
My cock twitches in anticipation, and I exhale a shaky breath before forcing myself to leave the bathroom, cursing my luck when I run into my housemate.
Dane whistles. “Look at you, captain dark and broody,” he teases with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Hot date with Hannah?”
Hannah’s become a good friend this past month, and while our fake dating schtick was only supposed to be for my father’s benefit, I can’t pass up the opportunity of the cover story to keep my housemate off my back.
I swallow my unease and paste a cocky smile on my face. “A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell.”
He laughs and shakes his head. “She’s good for you, man. You’ve loosened up a hell of a lot. I’m happy for you.”
“Thanks.” My stomach flips as I think about who really has me grinning like a damn fool, but when I conjure up his face, he’s no longer a masked stranger—he’s my goalkeeper.
Fuck.
I clear my throat and glance back at the bathroom, thinking about the sharp, instantaneous relief I could get from the intrusive thoughts, but I’ll be late if I don’t leave soon. I don’t want my Romeo to think I’m standing him up and leave. Or worse, find someone else.
Oblivious to my inner struggles, Dane slaps me on the back with a chuckle before making his way down the hall to his bedroom. “Have fun, and wrap it before you tap it, mate. I’m not baby-sitting your mistakes.”
I grimace. There’s no chance of that happening.
Before I can back out of tonight, I jog downstairs and out the door, locking it behind me. My breath fogs in front of me, and I shiver, pulling my leather jacket tighter around my body as I walk to my bike.
I grab my helmet and check that I have my mask, then climb on.
The moment I start the engine, the low rumble fills the quiet street, vibrating through my palms and into my chest. It steadies me, giving me the shot of confidence I need to roar out of my driveway and down the street towards the first guy to make me feel anything since Nathan.
The ride doesn’t take long—barely ten minutes—but it’s enough to gather my thoughts. I’m ready to put the past behind me and move towards my future. Dwelling on what happened in Perth won’t do anyone any good, and it won’t change what happened. It will make me morecautious about what I do from now on, but that’s what makes this work. The club gives me anonymity to be who I want to be.
One day, I hope I can find a way to be myself outside the walls of the club, but that’s future Noah’s problem. Tonight, I’m giving in to my basic instincts and going after what I want.
No. What Ineed.
I’ve been feeling too far removed from who I am while living under my father’s constant pressure to be the perfect son and heir. It’s exhausting, and I’m sick of wearingthatmask.
After parking my bike around the corner from Euphoria, I slide on my mask, using my bike mirrors to make sure my identity is hidden.
This mask doesn’t feel like a shackle, though; it feels like freedom and promise.
My nerves don’t disappear, but I hold my head high as I stroll down the alley to the discreet entrance to the club.
The woman behind the front desk smiles as she takes my jacket, then slides a royal blue keycard across the counter, gives me directions, and wishes me a good night.
Exhaling heavily, I cross the main lounge, striding down the corridor that leads to the navy curtain. There’s no turning back once I go through, but I don’t want to.
I’m ready to feel that sense of connection with someone again, even if he doesn’t know who I am.
