He merely stares, not providing an answer. But his silence is enough.
It tells me what I need to know.
Our relationship is dead. It died the same day as our son.
This… this is no longer fixable, and I have no more energy to even try anymore.
My right hand moves toward my left. I tug at the engagement ring on my finger, pulling it off and then grabbing his bloody, bruised hand.
I press the cool metal ring into his palm and close his long fingers around it.
“Then… then it’s over, Jin,” I say. “I can’t do this anymore, and you don’t want to either. I love you… but I can’t have a happy ending with a man who won’t let himself have one.”
He stares down at the ring in his hand, his expression unreadable.
“I’m leaving,” I continue. “First thing tomorrow. My mom and I will find somewhere else to stay.”
I turn from him and start down the hall, halting for a split second when I realize we haven’t been alone.
This entire time Mom’s been watching from the doorway of the guest room, her eyes round and misty, a deep frown on her face.
I know even at a glance that she’s heartbroken too; she understands what’s just happened.
…how serious this is. That this is final.
It’s really over.
I press on, hurrying down the hall until I reach our bedroom and close the door.
17.Monroe
The apartment looks exactlythe same.
Same modest furniture and view from the window. The same walls that once housed a different version of me.
I set down the final box in the middle of the living room and take a second to process the fact that I’m back.
The apartment I once lived in before I ever met a man named Seo Jin-tae. Before ever convincing myself that we could be happy together.
Jin offered to help me move. He wanted to set me up in an apartment that was heavily guarded and surveilled by his men for safety reasons.
…because, he reminded me, he would always take care of me.
But I turned him down. I can’t keep relying on him, not now that we’re truly over.
So I’ve returned to my old neighborhood in Seomyeon, grateful that the landlady was willing to grant me a new, short-term temporary lease because I was such a good tenant in the past.
No renovations have been made. The building is still amodest concrete structure with AC units attached to the windows and an elevator that’s a little janky at times.
But I don’t mind.
It’s only for three months at most. Enough time to figure out what I want to do.
“This is cozy, baby,” Mom says from behind the kitchen counter. “I forgot how much I loved your old apartment.”
She’s being bright and keeping things positive, trying her best to help me in what ways she can. We both know the place isn’t as upscale as the apartment I shared with Jin. There are no sleek finishes or heated floors or walk-in closets. But she gets how hard this whole thing has been for me, so she’s being uplifting.
She’s sticking by my side to help me through this.
