He cleared his throat.“Have you thought about your future there?Do you think you want to stay?”
“Of course I want to stay,” Emily said fervently.She was performing so well, she couldn’t see herself getting sacked, and she was having the time of her life.
“All right,” he said, then paused.“And what about later?You know, when a family is on the horizon?”
Emily felt stung.Her father had historically been her ally, had understood her in a way her mother didn’t.He was so proud of her for pursuingjournalism.He didn’t have a son to groom into the “family business,” but William had always treated her as though she were entirely capable—as capable as a man would have been.He was very fond of Jem, Emily knew, but so far—up until this moment, anyway—he’d refrained from any explicit comments about the couple’s future.It left Emily feeling a little betrayed to hear him hint so heavily like this.
No one had objected to Emily pursuing a university education—in fact, it was encouraged by both her parents, and Eleanor had even politely congratulated her.But the fact that she’d had the audacity to go out anddoanything with her hard-earned degree seemed beyond comprehension to Ellie, who had opted instead for basic secretarial training after high school and married the first man she laid eyes on at the law firm that hired her.
“Dad,” Emily began, but he cut across her, which he rarely did.
“Your mother thought it would come nicer as a surprise,” he said quietly, eyes darting toward the kitchen, then back to Emily, “but I don’t agree.The truth is, Jem came to us last week to discuss his intentions.”
It shouldn’t have come as a shock, but Emily’s body still reacted as though it had.Her stomach swooped like she’d missed a step and her hands clenched in her lap.For a moment, she and her father just stared at one another.She’d sensed it coming for a few months now, and couldn’t ignore the fact that the suspense had felt as though she were watching her own noose being braided and tied with a knot.
“I know that’s where you were headed,” William said.“But…”
“That’s whereJemwas headed,” Emily corrected him.“And Mom, and his family.But not me, Dad.I just…” Her knuckles were standing out white now.She flexed them, trying to relax.
“I think you have some time,” her father said reassuringly.“He’s saving for the ring now, but it’s coming.So you’re going to need to decide what your answer will be, my girl.Have you talked to him about what you want?AboutChatelaine?”
Emily shook her head.
“You’re going to need to do that.Youmustdo that.”
“But how can I tell him, Dad?”Emily pleaded, anger and fear and resentment all twisting together in her tone.“How can I tell him that I want more than what he can offer?That Iwantthis career?That any marriage I enter into will only be apartof my life, and not its entirety?What man is going to want to hear that?”
William sighed heavily.“Well, I can’t say that he’llwantto hear it.But he’s going to have to.And I think, if he asks for your hand and you say no…you have to tell him why.You’ve been going together long enough that he deserves an explanation.”
Emily hung her head.“I know.”
“Tell him what you just told me.And he’ll either accept those terms, or he won’t.”
“And if he won’t?”Emily asked, deflated.She felt tears prick at her eyes.
William shrugged.“Then he’s not the man for you.Then you both move on.”He looked strained, and Emily realized that he was wrestling with her situation almost as much as she was.
“But, might I suggest,” he said, squinting thoughtfully, “that you speak to Doris about this?”
Emily looked up, startled.“Speak to my boss?About Jem?”
“Yes.I think you’d be interested to hear her opinion.Doris Anderson also had a rather…unconventionallife trajectory, and has landed where she is.She’s managed to do everything she does while also having a family.So if that’s where you want to end up, go talk to the person who’s done it.Just like with any other interview: get your facts straight, hear their story, then see what you take from it.”
The cuckoo clock on the wall in the dining room ticked away the seconds.Emily tried to tune it out, tried to ignore the physical manifestation of the countdown that was now going to dictate her life in the coming weeks.She cleared her stuck throat.“Mom in the kitchen?”she asked, to change the subject.
“Yup,” her dad said, leaning back again in his chair.“Cooking for an army.”
Emily stood, brushed his shoulder affectionately and wanderedthrough the living room into the kitchen at the back of the house.Her heart fluttered with nerves.She wished Jem wasn’t coming tonight; she needed time to think.
“Hi Mom,” she said, greeting Bess, who was busy at the stove, her black hair frizzing in the steam issuing from a pot.
“Hello, darling,” her mother called, flashing a quick smile over her shoulder before attacking something with a whisk.“How was work?”Emily opened her mouth to answer but Bess kept talking.“Ellie will be here at six with the brood.Have you heard from Jeremy?He’s still coming, isn’t he?I know how he loves bourguignon.I do too, really.”She chuckled.
“Yes, he’s coming,” Emily said, working to keep the weariness from her voice.“He called the office on my lunch break.”
“Oh good!That’s nice that he calls, isn’t it?”
Emily half smiled, but didn’t answer, which prompted her mother to glance over her shoulder again, as though to check that Emily was, indeed, in agreement.She knew Bess thought she was never enthusiastic enough about her boyfriend, whom Bess loved.They were “Jem and Em,” a tidy little rhyming set.
