“Well, like most girls, I wanted to be a ballerina when I was like, six.” I laughed. “Of course, it would’ve helped if I’d actually taken lessons.”
He laughed a little, nodding in agreement.
“When I met my ex, I was actually pursuing a business degree…”
We ended up hanging out all afternoon. Two movies and hours of conversation later, I told him I had to go. “This was fun, Tyler.” And it had been. Strange, but fun. I felt like I’d just made a new friend, and I couldn’t explain why.
At the door, I waved to Snickers, suddenly unsure. I wanted to kiss Tyler goodbye, and yet, I didn’t.
Tyler solved the problem by leaning down and giving me a chaste kiss on the cheek. “I’ll see you soon. Thank you for coming over to check on me. I had fun today.”
“Me, too.” With a final wave at Snickers, I smiled and left.
The temperature had dropped, but luckily the rain had let up to barely a drizzle. I wandered the streets of the city, my head lost in thought. I was scared for Tyler. Something was obviously wrong with him, but I understood if he didn’t want to talk about it. Maybe he was waiting for test results or something.
It suddenly occurred to me that not once during our entire afternoon together, or any other time we’d spent together, had he mentioned family or friends. Other than a brief mention of his foster parents and his sister. And he hadn’t mentioned her at all today.
If he was dealing with something health-wise, he would need a good support system. People to help him get to appointments, sit with him, maybe worse. And I didn’t have time for that shit.
Shame quickly followed. How could I think that way? I mean, seriously, how fucking selfish could I be?
I stopped in the middle of the street and looked around. Tears filled my eyes, blurring the sight of the city just beginning to light up for the night. I didn’t even know what I was crying about. For Tyler? Or for myself?
But I did know. I wasn’t crying because I was selfish. I was crying because he’d made me care. And now I didn’t know what the hell was going to happen to him. I didn’t even know where he’d gone today. Because that may have been Tyler’s body sitting next to me, but it sure as hell wasn’t Tyler.
Wiping the moisture from my eyes, I realized I wasn’t far from Stef’s apartment. I thought about stopping by, but honestly, I wouldn’t be great company, and I had to catch the bus back home. Taking a deep breath, I crossed the street and headed toward the bus stop. I had a full day at the studio tomorrow. For right now, I would think about that and only that.
And I was a fool if I believed I could do that.
CHAPTER15
Tyler
Squinting against the bright sunlight, I rolled over to look at the clock…
And fell from the couch onto the floor, banging my head on the edge of the coffee table. “Fuckin’ hell!” The words were thick on my tongue. On my hands and knees, I raised my head and stared at the two empty mugs in front of me. There was a bowl shoved off to the side with a few popcorn kernels left in the bottom.
I groaned as my head throbbed like I’d just gotten off of a three-week bender. “What the fuck?”
A long tongue licked a wet trail up my face and I closed my eyes again before it jabbed my eyeball and reached for my dog. “Hey, buddy.” The sense of panic that had been swiftly rising within me subsided as I received the best good morning a guy could get, other than if Ailee was here, maybe.
I eyed the mugs again.Hadshe been here? Did she even know where I live? I guess she would, being she was the one who sent me my checks. Willow was the only other person who came by on the regular, and she was a caffeine junkie through and through. Coffee only for that girl. The stronger, the better.
Snickers let out a yip and jumped up to lick me again. “All right, all right. Whatcha need, buddy?” I got up and headed into the kitchen to check his food and water.
But he had other plans. The pup half ran, half skidded to the back door and did a little dance, his nails clicking on the tiles.
“Ah, I get it.” I opened the patio door for him, leaving it open so he could come back in when he was ready.
My phone was lying on the counter, and I picked it up. The battery was down to five percent, and I had two missed calls from Ailee and a text message from my sister. I glanced at the screen again as I walked back to my room. Was it too early to call Ailee back?
It was eight in the morning, on Wednesday, September 18th.
Wednesday.
I stopped just inside my room. That couldn’t be right. If it was, I’d missed the first day of classes. The last thing I remembered was leaving Ailee’s place on Friday night.
What had I done after I’d left? On legs stiff from being crunched up on the couch, I hobbled to the bed and sat down as I tried to figure out why this was happening again. In some distant recess of my brain, it occurred to me that it had been made. I never made my bed. Didn’t see the point. My heart began to pound so hard I thought it was gonna break through my ribcage and my head felt light. The world spun around me, and I forced myself to breathe.
