“I did that,” he gloats.
And as bad as it is to watch him rub his fingers together, I’d prefer that than being forced to look into his eyes.
He manhandles me around, keeping his fingers in the light so I can see the discolouration on them. He drops his body down on me, talking into my face.
“You see that, Simona? I did that because I could. You know why?”
He doesn’t wait for me to answer him. He just ramps up his abuse, ruining me some more.
“What I do and who I am with is my business and has nothing to do with you. I can do whatever I want and no one will stop me. Even when you’re hiding at that posh school, I’ll own you. And I’m finding out, Simmy, maybe you do have a use after all,” he whispers angrily as he drops his body and crushes me.
Numbness floods my mind, taking my pain far, far away. I’m not stupid. I know exactly what he’s doing. In some alternate place I feel the brutality of him taking my innocence. I might not be making a noise or telling him to stop, but I desperately wish I could.
“Let me in,” he yells, scaring me and dragging me out of my safe space I’d managed to find in my mind.
I whimper. The sound feeds his mood. And he intentionally worsens the pain of his intrusion in response.
“You could have made this easier, Simona, but you’re always so fucking icy. Stop fighting!”
He grips my face, and I have no choice but to look at him. He’s smiling like an asp; his eyes are slitted, full of triumph. He doesn’t let go of my face, forcing me to watch him right to the bitter end.
But then he moves on to ruination.
“You will not tell a living soul,” he barks, as a callous smile grows brighter by the second, as he finds the words to use. “I forbid you from speaking about me. I forbid you for thinking you can leave. I forbid you acting against me. I forbid you thinking of Daniel. I forbid you trying to stop me. I forbid you. You’re so fucking weak. I forbid you.” Repeating, again and again. It’s like hammering nails into a piece of wood, forever holding it in place.
“I forbid you. Every time I see you, all I’ll have to do is whisper in your ear—I forbid you—and I’ll turn you as useless as you are now. Even if you somehow manage to defy me, no one will ever believe you. I mean, why would they? You’re nothing, Simona.”
Of course he is smiling, like a crocodile.
His scent drowns me into unconsciousness.
Chapter
Three
SIMONA
Confusion clouds my thoughts, until I realise where I am. My bedroom. I don’t remember getting here but to be honest I have been walking in a veritable fog since the night with Brody weeks ago. I don’t think I’ve slept a handful of hours or walked a hundred steps without questioning where I am or how I got there. The lack of memory is temporary, and in the next heartbeat, the floodgates reopen like they have every day for the past however many days.
The horror rushes back in full, awful, vivid clarity.
Sounds of Brody fill my ears, while each and every touch of his burns as I relive the horror. Again. As always, after I remember the touches, his tainted scent is all I can smell—so strong, so suffocating—I spin around, expecting him to be in my room.
I’m alone. And I’m thankful for that because without his commanding bark and intimidating presence to keep me quiet, I break down in a flurry of loud tears. One sob thoughand all of a sudden my throat is closing, letting my panic fester.
I literally fall off my bed. Though it was intentional because a part of me, a huge part, needs to run away and hide in darkness as the shame surges to life. I crawl under my bed, not stopping until I’m swallowed by the deepest shadow. Only then do I feel safe enough to curl into a small ball. Without grace, this is how most mornings begin—hiding, letting everything go. I cry and cry until the tears stop falling and the ache in my chest finally loosens its grip.
His bark worked. It keeps working. Every time I try to tell my family, Brody’s command to stay silent and not share even one thing with anyone rings in my ears, vibrating a command that rattles through me from my head to my toes, stealing words from my lips. It’s horrid.
I know my parents are aware something has happened. At the same time, they’ve made little attempt to figure it out. I don’t want to say they’re hiding behind Lawson’s needs, but it is what I feel, which only adds to the crushing sadness I now have inside my heart. Not for the first time in my life, I wish they saw beyond the world they’ve spent their entire lives perfecting.
Brody continues his rise as an emerging key-player in the Henderson family. He can do no wrong. And worst of all, he knows it. He probably didn’t even need to bark me silent—nothing I say would ever change their mind about the kind of person he is.
More than that, I suspect no one would question what he did because in their eyes, it was his right as my intended Alpha. They might not approve of the timing, but in the end, they’d fall back on the fact that we were ‘packed’ together. And given how adored he is, I have no doubt they’d weave the story—turning me into the villain, crafting excuses for him so neatly that I’d be the one left carrying the blame.
I’m not going to waste my energy on trying to sway anyone. Why should I?
I know I said no. I know he barked in my face until my fight was gone. I know he thinks he won.
