Now my eyes bug out. “You’re giving me a pep talk? Really, is there something in the Seattle water?”
He laughs and leans back on his couch. “Isla, I’m stating the fucking obvious.”
I huff yet again today and drop my shoulders. “I’m hearing that a lot lately.”
“Listen, I may need to roast him in the wedding speeches if you ever get married. But Vaughn… I don’t know… I hate him when it comes to hockey, but he is bearable when it comes to you and my niece. This isn’t even about Nora, and you know it. You were just looking for a crack to justify that everything is within your grasp, the whole nine yards.” He rolls a shoulder back and dips his eyes as if he wants to downplay his confession. “So yeah, maybe he is a little more bearable than I thought… he’ll fight for you.”
“Yeah, I will.”
The sound of Vaughn’s voice from behind me catches me off guard, and my head whips in his direction. I didn’t hear him come in. But he’s now leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets and his feet crossed, his face stoic.
I quickly glance back at my phone.
“I guess that’s my cue to hang up. Didn’t plan this timing, but I don’t particularly want to watch this go down.” He drags out his words then speeds up. “Bye, Sis.” And my screen shows me that the call ended.
Which means that I need to turn back to the scene of Vaughn who has returned and is ready to pick up right where he left off. This time he is calmer, poised, and making my heart thump in a new sort of way.
“I wasn’t expecting you this early.” I slowly manage to form a sentence.
A glimmer of a faint smirk appears on his lips. “The element of surprise is something we have experience in.” Vaughn uncrosses his feet and strides toward us with a bit of swagger that just comes naturally to him.
The moment he enters my bubble, a ripple spreads across my skin. It’s anticipation for what is about to come.
He leans down to greet our daughter, an instant smile appearing on both their faces. “Hey there, kiddo, you’re growing a little too much for my liking. Slow it down, will ya? You’re rolling over and reaching for things. Next thing I know we’ll need to baby-proof the fu-… fudge out of this place.”
The view of them together thaws my mixed emotions slightly.
Vaughn glances at me. “Let’s get her down for a nap and then we can talk. I’ll do it.” He’s already swooping Nora up into his arms before I can answer.
It makes sense, as the revelations that are floating around us shouldn’t have little ears present, however, it doesn’t help my shooting nerves. I pace a few times around the living room, debating if I should grab a glass of wine, because I need to feel a little more serene if I don’t want to be an emotional mess.
By the time Vaughn re-appears, we take a moment to get lost in a gaze. I’m debating if sitting down is a good start to keep the next moments flowing. He doesn’t let me decide as he walks straight to me and frames my face in the palms of his hands. His eyes stare straight into mine, ensuring I can’t escape from the shackles of his fortitude in this moment.
“I’m not going anywhere, Isla,” he whispers. My mouth parts open but barely a sound escapes. “I understand. Really, I do. I can’t apologize for expressing the truth,” he informs me.
“You kind of threw it back in my face that I never told you,” I begin to rehash the other morning, but I keep my tone weak while I blink a few times.
His thumb starts to draw a circle on my cheek. “Not my intention. We can’t change the facts, but we can move on from it. I promise I have. I got to see Nora born, and that’s what really matters as far as your pregnancy is concerned. You get that, right?” He gently presses his palms tighter against the outline of my face.
I swallow, as this is one aspect that I believe we can both let go of. “I do. We can agree on one thing.”
Vaughn steps closer which only heightens the beating in my chest. “We can agree on a lot of things. Hell, we want the same things.”
“Maybe I’ve overreacted, okay, I probably did. But you said that once you thought?—”
He cuts me right off. “Shh, Isla. I was honest, but it also takes a millisecond for things to be clear. I had a brief speck of doubt, only for extreme certainty to follow. A commitment that I’m never going to break.”
Geez, can these tears stop appearing. Do I even have any left? Because water pools at the bottom of my eyes.
“I’m scared.”
Vaughn presses his lips against my forehead and releases his hold on my face, only to wrap his arms around my back to pull me close to his chest. “Fear only makes us do better.”
Through my tears, I snort a laugh. “Is that something from your hockey career?”
“It’s the truth, though.” His voice sounds eased. He holds me tighter, as if he will never let go. “This isn’t about our daughter at all. Because we have something to celebrate, as we are the type of parents we hoped to be. I think you are confronted by the fact that we were probably two broken people who were missing something. But now we fit together, and it fixes everything. I believe we are one and the same. Our hope was always lingering. Now we are two people who connect on a different level than we ever expected. It's scary, but it’s us.”
My mouth begins to quiver. “It sounds so poetic the way you said it, even if it’s the truth.”
